This "before" pic is one of my favorites. I cannot begin to express how much I adore that sweet girl on the left. If you want to know who inspires me, it's her. And, every time I see this pic - I want to reach across time and give her the biggest hug and let her know what a phenomenal being she is and I hope I am doing her justice.
Interestingly enough, out of these 2 gals - one of them is on some pretty heavy chemo potent "performance enhancing" steroids.
Can you tell me which one? LOL - it should be pretty obvious.
Though, I didn't have mine injected. Nope - they gave it straight to me in an IV for 5 straight days. It took a few hours to empty out the bag each day and then I was able to be free of that damn "coat rack" device and hit my mile quota around the oncology ward at the hospital.
I can still remember the attending Doc sitting in a chair just to the right of the girl in the left photo saying, "I cannot believe how well your system handled such a potent dose of steroids the first time around. It's amazing!"
All I noted at the time was that my blood sugars and blood pressure were elevated, but other than that - my body didn't seem to even register it. Nope, what I was focused on was the extremely high White Blood Cell Count, and when the 3 bands of Oglio dendrocite cells were found in my spinal fluid - I felt pretty certain, hands down we were dealing with MS.
Still the battery of tests is unbelievable. At times it felt like each day at the hospital required a daily planner and a personal assistant. An hour and a half in the MRI machine, another hour for a spinal tap, another couple hours where I wasn't allowed to move afterward so I didn't lose any spinal fluid, meeting with the Occupational therapist, meetings with the Physical therapist, and blood test after blood test, after blood test. It's friggin amazing I was able to fit in lunch, I was so busy!
It's a damn good thing I was on steroids, I would have been exhausted otherwise. LOL!!!
So, did yours truly take advantage of all the performance enhancing elixer?
Well, honestly I tried. Not while it was being administered of course. But, I did ask them if I could continue working out when I got home. And, they said "Absolutely, just don't over do it because you're still so numb you may not know when your muscles are beginning to fatigue"
I mean there was so much energy and I wasn't able to sleep all that well. On top of it they put me on a steroid taper when I got home. I felt like a "roid queen" lemme tell ya.
What else was I going to do with that much roid in my system, but workout?! However, to this day I have no idea whether or not it actually enhanced my performance. And, really as annoyed as I was about having to be on that many steroids, I now understand they were desperately trying to get the inflammation down in my spinal chord, reduce the damage the active lesion was causing...
and, in short save my ability to walk on these precious two legs.
I'm so glad I didn't know why they were fussing, hustling, and bustling around me all day with that look in there eye whispering under hushed breath, "I think...I think maybe she'll be okay."
I don't even know where my measure of calm during all that was coming from.
What I do know is that sweet, lovely girl on the left parted from the hospital with a walker, discovered a precious light within herself, and one itty bitty step at a time - forged herself into the girl on the right. So, now you know why I'm so in love with that "roid queen" on the left there.
Do I take steroids now?
The simple answer is no.
After the taper was done in 2017, I thankfully have not had to do them again. But, for the record the 5 day "chemo-potent" dose of steroids provided at the hospital intravenously is standard protocol for MS flare-ups. Nowadays, we don't even have to stay in the hospital to get them, we can do it outpatient style and empty our "roid bags" when it's convenient. The only reason they admitted me is because they didn't know if it was MS or another rare demyelinating disease known as transverse myelitus. Not to mention, when the legs go numb - it's a sign direct damage to the spinal cord is happening and time is of the essence before numbness turns into complete paralyzation.
Another thing to note in some MS clinics, taking this kind of dose can be optional. Just because an MS flare up happens, does not always mean damage to the central nervous system will occur. It depends on the size of the lesion, where it's located, and how severe the symptoms are. Some MS'ers choose not to take the steroids during flare-ups because, as the good doc noted - that kind of potent dose takes a huge toll on the kidneys. So, it's not the kind of performance enhancing elixer one wants to put their body through if they don't have to. For, whatever reason I lucked out. But, I'm so thankful I've never had to take them again and petition the universe I never will.
Anyhow, on another note - as stated last week I'm hanging steady with my current cals. No increases this week. Next Tuesday is my b-day and also a surplus day. So, weigh-ins may be a little wonky until things level out around Nov. 8. One of the goals I'm really implementing is paying attention to body measurements right now. Waist and hips specifically. I'm really aiming for lean gains here, so as weight increases - what becomes more essential than scale weight is measurement.
I know there has been an increase in muscle mass. I can feel it, but at 18% body fat, I can see it readily now. We're not talking pounds of muscle by any stretch, but it's happening. So, it will be essential to use body measurements to keep track and ensure that increased fuel is going toward muscle growth vs. body fat over the next year.
Other than that dear friends, we just keep on keepin' on :-)
Have an amazing, blissful week everyone! I will catch you next weekend.
