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This week has sucked giant monkey balls. Because of the current housing situation, my former boyfriend and I are still living in the same house. Thankfully, we're in different bedrooms, but we still love each other and having to linger in this space for another month before the lease is up is so hard. Between starting my period and Valentine's Day this week, I cannot stop crying. I caved last night and ate a slice of leftover cake from my niece's birthday. It didn't make me feel good, but I don't even care about that. I want things to go back to how they used to be between me and my man, but you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube once you've squeezed it out.
My heart hurts. Usually I would want to binge, but I'm too sad for that. I don't feel like eating anything at all. I thought I was done with being broken hearted. I thought we were in it for the long haul....
Diet Calendar Entry for 14 February 2019:
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1296 kcal
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Fat: 72.36g | Prot: 47.63g | Carb: 121.46g.
Breakfast: V8 Veggie Blend Healthy Greens, Trader Joe's Baby Spinach, Frozen Blueberries, Whole Foods Market Natural Peanut Butter. Lunch: Cooked Lentils. Dinner: Tanimura & Antle Romaine Lettuce, Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Calavo Avocado, Safeway Chunk Light Tuna in Water. Snacks/Other: Raspberry Cream Pie. more...
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 Comments
Grief is funny thing. You think you are doing just fine and then along comes something (or a bunch of something's) that just rips you open like a fresh wound. The situation you are currently in is familiar to me and my heart aches for you. I was able to alter my work schedule so I didn't have to spend any more time than necessary in their presence, and spent a lot of time walking at the local mall (combining exercise with avoidance). The last thing you want right now is advice, but this really is the perfect time to take a walk. Exercising (even while crying) is incredibly cathartic, especially when someone you counted on being there for you has let you down (again?). Someone you would have done anything for, made any sacrifice for... that is when I had my major breakthrough that I need to be the person who will NEVER let me down, and to hell with everyone else!
14 Feb 19 by member: ConiMN
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Thank you so much, Coni. Definitely been doing a lot of walking/hiking. The saddest part is that he's not a bad man...we just want completely different things and have grown in different directions. Oh, and he lied to me about still being married and his massive debt....you know, the usual stuff 😠😢
28 Feb 19 by member: christina_bologna
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