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10 May 2012

Well, 10 days went by like lightning. I guess I didn't really diet much during that time, smaller portions, but nothing significantly restricted. I was trying to lose weight and got discouraged I guess when it didn't continue to slip off like the first 10 lbs did. However, last night we went to see friends and someone noticed I had lost weight. That was the first time someone noticed. It was pretty cool. My neck is less uncomfortable. I want to shed more weight before summer. I am at a frustrating 256 right now, just a .02 lbs up from last weight in, but it's more than that. It's 1 lb to break an 8 year weight record. That's a big deal to me..... but I just haven't reached it yet despite the strong desire. I have been busy, no days off in weeks. Maybe I just need time to focus more? Either way, I'm going to break this, I'm going to win. :)
Weigh-in: 256.0 lb lost so far: 16.0 lb still to go: 84.0 lb Diet followed poorly
   (1 comment) gaining 0.1 lb a week

30 April 2012

Weigh-in: 255.8 lb lost so far: 16.2 lb still to go: 83.8 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment losing 1.9 lb a week

22 April 2012

Well, I guess that time has finally come. I chose to control what I put in my mouth for the first time in order to lose weight.... and it worked. I always felt like it was too big to tackle, like I couldn't accomplish it. I even felt like it was pointless to try. Until recently when my fantastic fiance gave me the strength to look at it from different perspective. He saw in me what I could not. Now, I want to see it too. I needed to see if old school effort would work despite my convincing myself it wouldn't and I am pleased to report success. It wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it was either, at least right now. I'm sure reaching my goal will not be easy, but I am beginning to feel that it is obtainable. I hunger for success more than I hunger for food. It's a strange sensation for me... but I like it.
Weigh-in: 258.0 lb lost so far: 14.0 lb still to go: 86.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (1 comment) losing 3.9 lb a week

17 April 2012

Weigh-in: 260.8 lb lost so far: 11.2 lb still to go: 88.8 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment losing 7.0 lb a week

16 April 2012

I actually saw the scale do something new day before yesterday... it was under 260 for the first time in at least 4 years. That made me feel both motivated, and accomplished. I gave myself a break and ate badly, only to gain the pound back by next weigh in. Now I want it back, that under 260 mark. I had hoped to walk today, but I didn't make it out. I hope to make progress on that this week. However, I reduced my intake pretty dramatically today. I wasn't really that hungry.

My life has gone a path that kept me busy and disinterested in my appearance and health. That is behind me, and a healthier future ahead. I want to see a size 18 again and not hate buying clothes. I want to prove to myself that this issue cannot beat me. I've never tried that hard, so it's no surprise I failed. Now, I'm ready to try even if I fail... and if I fail... I want to try again. That is a new one for me. When I quit smoking cigarettes my mother told me that she knew once I put my mind to something, nothing could stop me. I realize, that's true. I am an unstoppable force when I have put my mind to it. This one issue, I have allowed myself to have no willpower over. That will no longer do. I started this account because I have been slowly preparing myself to obtain this long-term goal. I attended a challenge, although I admit to half-assing it... I learned a LOT about what I put into my body through the calorie count function. I think something has changed in me recently that I feel compelled to push harder. I want this.
Weigh-in: 261.8 lb lost so far: 10.2 lb still to go: 89.8 lb Diet followed N/A
   add comment gaining 0.4 lb a week

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