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14 August 2010

I have blown my diet this week, after reading the things I have been eating, I realized I have been eating way to much. I also think I should toss my candy out, but, maybe I just need to readjust my thinking. One of my biggest mistakes is eating late at night, it is habit, I am not really hungry most of the time, also if I wasn't eating I could probably get more rest. I have been lazy about my dieting, I am really gaining weight now and it is really scaring me, I want the old me back, when I was thin, I got to the point where I was thinking about weight gain every time I took a bite of anything, I have to be that way again or I am on my way to some serious trouble w/my weight. I definitely gained weight this week and feel ashamed. I stuffed my face at night time at every opportunity. This nonsense has got to stop and right now. As I write down what I am eating all day, it is way to much, it is almost as if my life is beginning to revolve around food. I have joined a few challenges to help combat some of these problems, one of the challenges is not to eat after nine at night, it will be extremely difficult for me but I think very important as well. The other one is to break a bad habit or habit's, I know what I must do there, the other one is weight lifting which I have just started again anyway but now can get a bit more intense, one of the challenges I find very difficult is to weigh in only on Sunday's, I have been worried all week about weight gain, I suppose when I know I am losing the wait will be fine because I know when I get on there on Sunday, I will have lost and it will be fun seeing that scale really drop down. I will probably join more challenges as they come up or I may make up one that seems important at the time. I ate almost the same thing today as I did the other days, so it is all pretty much the same calories and I believe now that I am over eating. This is all for now, will try and write in this journal later tonight. That's it for now, need to exercise.

10 August 2010

Monday night I did very well, although, even though I eat good things, I am still eating very late at night, if this affects my weight loss, I will definitely quit eating late at night, it is tuna, egg salad, turkey, cheese and salami, I know salami isn't the best for you but I love it. As I said though if it affects my weight, I will have to cut that down or leave it out of my diet.
Tuesday might I didn't do as well. I didn't eat all day, oh yes, I had under half a quarter cup of granola and three cheese curds equaling under 1 ounce. For dinner a huge green salad, cheeseburger, a small portion of pork roast w/au jus and a large tablespoon of both tuna and egg salad. Turkey slices from the deli and salami. The burger has 2 slices of American cheese on it, that extra slice I should definitely have done without. By the looks of this, when writing it all down, it definitely looks like I am eating to much, I need to cut down now.
Then last night, very late, I had more tuna/egg salad with turkey and salami and a piece of Lorraine swiss cheese. I probably need to cut out that last eating thing I do every night, late at night. I just feel as though if I go to bed hungry, I will wake up and eat something I should not be eating, just to fill my self up in a hurry. That is why I have my lunch meat and egg/tuna salad.
Weigh-in: 112.5 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 12.5 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (1 comment) steady weight

09 August 2010

Weigh-in: 112.5 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 12.5 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment gaining 1.0 lb a week

07 August 2010

I did bad once again, last night as well. I am starting to get worried now, I am putting on weight, starting to think I have a few emotional problems that are not helping things, I am very unhappy, but, cheating on my diet is only making things worse, because than I feel like a failure in that as well. It is almost as if I am trying to gain weight bu the looks of the things I am eating and the amount. I have truly got to straighten up and start losing weight and get that good feeling that I have accomplished something, at least in that part of my life, I think it would help my over all being. I don't know what to do. I do, but, I keep going a stray. I need to be stronger with my eating habits or I will have a bigger problem on my hands. I am so unhappy w/my weight and now I am making it worse. How to go about getting my mind straightened out. I need to be afraid to keep adding calories and carbs, it is the only thing that is going to help me,, I also need more rest, that certainly is not helping me. It is my belly that is driving me crazy right now, I have been looking up abdominal exercise , so hopefully I can start some new ones tomorrow. I have an idea, I will come into my closet every time I want to eat something and look at my skinny clothes, they keep getting further and further away from fitting me and that makes me really sad, well, brighten up I say, move on, try again. I had better sign out now, it is very late at night and I need to sleep, got lots to do tomorrow. I will try harder tomorrow, for sure.

02 August 2010

Weigh-in: 111.5 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 11.5 lb Diet followed N/A

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