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18 January 2018

Good Morning?

I been on and off this site since I was in my 20's. I am older and still struggle with my weight. I have finally overcome the medical issues now its my mental and physical self I need to change. I need to get in the mind set of being healthy and challenging myself daily.

I was scared to make my journal public. I have a very non-supportive and critical in-laws. My race, weight and how I dress has been a big part of there conversations. It actually makes them feel better to have someone to break down or be a thier enemy. Funny things is I don't think they even like each other but the collective dislike of me keeps them together. I was afraid they find my journal and pick on me. Oh, she fat again. Look at that I knew she wouldn't keep the weight off...you know stuff like that.

I am taking classes online for me. I am losing weight for me. I need the support and if I can't get from family I can sure use from you and friends.

I had some serious stomach problems lately. My doctor said its due to stress and suggest I drink more liquids. I am going to do that. My first goal is to be under 200 again. This is going to be hard because this weekend I will siting my the bedside of man I consider to be my father. He not my father biology but he been their for me. He dying of cancer and he said he wouldn't leave with out saying goodbye to me. He said his tried and ready to go. So for the next couple days I will be sitting by the bed side of the first man I have ever loved. I will look at the man who was 6'8 210 pounds, who now is 130 pounds, unable walk or speak. I promise myself I will hold his hand until he takes his last breath. I will do this.


I promise him I will be heathy and strong. I am sad but he would and wants me to be happy. he want to be to accomplish all my goals in life. DADDY I WILL I PROMISE
Weigh-in: 209.0 lb lost so far: 4.0 lb still to go: 59.0 lb Diet followed 100%
   (1 comment) losing 28.0 lb a week

17 January 2018

Weigh-in: 213.0 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 63.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment steady weight

12 January 2018

10 January 2018

I had pizza for breakfast, Yummy!


Okay, yes I had pizza for breakfast. I had ATKINS Stone Fired Pizza. 380 calories, 23g of protein, 2g sugar and 11g Net Carbs.

I wanted Pizza and I found the best solution for myself to satisfy that craving. I am full. I should be good until Lunch at 12:30. In the mean time I have drank 32oz of water my goal is to finish another 32oz of water. I have a large cucumber everyday follow by a nightly chai tea, I like that routine. Oh for lunch I am going to have one cup of homemade vegan chill with a sprinkle Vermont sharp cheddar cheese.

Let me vent a bit here. I am doing cross fit and walking 1 mile a day. I try to speed walk to get my time under 18 minutes. I have so far keep up with this. My lovely husband who is naturally thin and fit looking agreed to do a mile everyday with me. Yesterday he chicken out and decided to Tuesday would be his break day. His excuse is his legs were sore.

Okay my husband doesn't have ounce of fat on him. He is built like a geek god statue with a much larger leaf ( if you know what mean). I was always told that when a man gets pass 30, that worm that makes them skinny dies, that is a lie! My husband has kept his amazing body no matter his age or diet since I have known him, 16 plus years to be exact. Did my legs hurt from working out yesterday of course, did they feel like hell this morning of course. I managed to do my mile walk yesterday and today.

My secret motivation is to surprise my husband at the sight of me being in much better shape and health them himself, lol. Love him so much but goodness;)

09 January 2018

I wonder if what they say about muscle weighing more than fat is true?

I did my cross-fit work out which included doing burpees to celebrate two women birthdays in our group. I am not in the best shape but at the beginning of the workout we had to do 45 and at the end of our cross-fit work out 43. I did a mix of jumping jacks and burpees. I have trouble bending my foot due to surgeries so it a struggle for me anyways.

I got home and you know when you do a work out like that you feel like hell but your like I had to loss 5 pounds just by doing that. Well that would be great if it work that way. Just to test it I weighed myself, no such luck. I am the same weight I was yesterday.

Anyway I am proud of myself, I managed to speed walk 1 mile today and yesterday in 18 minutes. Yes, 18 minutes! Like I said I am not in the best shape but I plan on getting there.

See you Friday, fingers cross my Monday weight shows some sign of progress :)

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