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25 March 2010

Weigh-in: 263.7 lb lost so far: 1.3 lb still to go: 63.7 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment losing 7.0 lb a week

24 March 2010

So yesterday was a better day for me. I stuck to my plan, still not able to come below 1500, but that's soooo much better than my average 3500 a day calorie intake (I'm sure it's been more than that, but we will just say 3500 hehe). I haven't started exercising yet, but I have started to feel better already with less junk in my diet. I know I can do it this time. There's nothing to get in my way now (except for my trip to the east coast this weekend...it's gonna really test my willpower!). So next week, I will start walking in the morning. Maybe I will take Jamar with me lol he may like the walking. Or better yet, take Raeleigh for a stroller ride. WE are supposed to walk when i get home from work, but that has only happened twice out of 2 weeks....can't depend on that.

Anyway, Day three, off to a great start!

23 March 2010

ALERT! ALERT ****FAILED*** I REPEAT ****FAILED****

They say that you should multiply the weight you want to be by 1000% to come up with the calorie comsumption to maintain that weight (i.e. if you want to weight 250 and maintain that weight, you cannot consume more than 2500 calories per day). So yesterday, I consumed 1590, which considering I am 267 lbs, that's still not bad, but I went nuts once I left work. I got in my car, ate the macadamia nuts that were left over from my non-eating right days, then got home, ate the scheduled meal, which was awesome and filling, but continued to snack the rest of the night. NOT GOOD! But I had to keep telling myself, that I'm okay, because I still wasn't anywhere near my normal comsumption of calories, but still felt like shit and wished I could just go throw up everything and pretend it never happened (don't get me wrong, I'm not bulemic, just wished I hadn't gone overboard). So today, of course, I wake up early because I stayed up too late playing video games, didn't really prepare any kind of lunch, but still managed to throw a bunch of healthy low calorie snacks in my lunchbox and depend on the low calorie soup I have at work for my actual lunch. I will continue to try to beat this weight and have to remember just because I make one boo-boo doesn't mean I give up.
Weigh-in: 265.7 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 65.7 lb Diet followed poorly
   (1 comment) gaining 0.7 lb a week

22 March 2010

So I woke up this morning with my hand on my belly and was like, oh MY GOD! How did I let myself get back to where I was? I have let my lack of desire for life determine what I do with my body. I am 37 and have not got heavier than 285, but I was able to slim down to 249 and felt SOOOO good about myself. I was able to come down in size on my pants, I started to get my confidence again, and then BAM. I hit a wall and went downhill. I can tell you the exact date-9/24/09. Nicoles Birthday. Then my birthday, then thanksgiving, then Christmas.

So today I woke up, had a conversation with my husband about how unhappy he was, blah blah blah, and it occured to me, that I haven't been living for me or my son. I have been emotionally eating, and trying to convince myself that I could continue to eat and be fat and who cares because I'm not worth what I should be. So enough of the feeling sorry for myself and now I have to submit a new plan to life. This isn't about me. This is about the fact that you dont see any overweight people over the age of 75. This about the fact that I want to see what my son does for himself, and who he becomes, and to continue to live life and experience how beautiful it is. I really enjoy life and how it makes me feel. Not necessarily the drama, or the money probs, but life itself.

So today, this is about me. This is about taking care of me and living. I am starting fresh today.

16 March 2010

Weigh-in: 265.0 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 65.0 lb Diet followed N/A

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