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20 July 2018

So this is day 5! Almost a week down and only the rest of my life to go. I used to love to cook when I was younger, and then it became a chore and I began to hate it. So my son has been doing it for about 2 years now. Well his eating needs are extremely different than mine. He's 18, a basketball player and enlisted in the Army. He's into protein and carbs. Yeah, I can't do that. So since starting my journey, I've started to cook again. And surprisingly enough, I'm rather enjoying it. I measure out everything (still waiting for the scale to arrive) and that kind of satisfies my need for control. Tonight for the first time ever, I was proud of what I was putting in my mouth. I truly enjoyed my dinner and was mindful of every bite, of how it tasted, how I felt, knowing that what was going in wasn't mindless, empty junk.

18 July 2018

17 July 2018

So I'm having an okay day today. Except for 1/2 hour in the middle of my day. I have an 18 year old man-child that lives with me (he's still got his senior year to go) and he doesn't understand what I'm going through. I tried to ask him to not eat certain kinds of foods in front of me and he said basically that he'd eat what he wanted when he wanted doesn't matter where I am. I am not feeling the support from him, but I understand sort of because he has seen me start and stop and start and stop so many times. The bright spot in my day so far is that I haven't overeaten and for the first time ever, I was able to publically out myself as a food addict. I saw my psychiatrist today and in the waiting room there was a cooking show on the tv. So I went to the receptionist and told her that I am a food addict and if she could please change the channel. She was more than happy to do that and I realized that it's okay to stick up for myself.

17 July 2018

Weigh-in: 328.0 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 29.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well

16 July 2018

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