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I didn't weight myself going into this. I just did a round-about guess. I probably should have weighed myself!
I need to curb my night time snacking. This is where the majority of calories are eaten.
Im worried - Im on two new types of medication as of this week and they both are known for weight gain. So now Im on three known for causing over eating and weight gain. Im a bit low. I know that I need these medications at the moment however I also feel like I shouldn't be eating anything at all.
From now on I am going to call my eating disorder Stanley (no offence to anyone out there called Stanley!) because it is at this point that I really need to start seeing my ED for what it is. It is a part of me but it is in no way ME!
Stanley has been turning up a lot lately and most of the time I have been happy to see him. Im not going to lie, I get a good few pay offs from Stanley's visits. However Im really going to have to challenge myself from this point on. For example, "Do I want to eat this? Or is it Stanley that wants me to eat this?"
Ive got to slow down my eating. Be more mindful with the food that's going into my mouth.
I can cut down my bread in take again - and no white bread will enter this house from now on!
Birthdays and holidays aside, cake and party type food does me no good being in the house either. Sigh. Did I celebrate my daughters birthday last week? Or was I just pacifying Stanley?
Small, baby steps and changes is key. I want to look back at this in six months time and see all the changes I have made and be happy with myself.
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323.0 lb
Lost so far: 16.5 lb.
Still to go: 60.6 lb.
Diet followed poorly.
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gaining 14.3 lb a week
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