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I am really amazed with myself. I have struggled with my weight my whole life and have tried to lose weight many, many times before. I usually was successful and would drop some weight but life would always get in the way and I would start slacking and eventually stop my diet and the weight would come back with a vengeance.
It always seemed like it was an unwinnable battle that I would have to keep fighting for the rest of my life. I would get up to around my heaviest weight (at the time) and then I would know that I had to do something about it, and I would, but once I got back down to a comfortable weight (that would only be like 25-30 pound loss) and could see a change, I would slow down or stop my diet all together and all the weight that I had lost plus some would come back within a couple of months (sometimes not even).
It was always about fad diets and what kind of new weight loss trend was out there. Some magical remedy that worked for a friend of a friend of a friend, and if it had worked so well for her then it just had to work for me. But they absolutely never worked, for me anyways. Maybe the friend of a friend of a friend of mine just had better genes than me? Or maybe I was just destined to be a fatty all of my life? Or… maybe I just needed to give my head a shake, wake up, and really get on board…with my LIFE.
This whole time I have been beating myself up, day after day, month after month, thinking that there was something wrong with me, thinking my body just wasn’t made for being skinny (I was big boned and going to have to live with it). But the truth is my body is made to be whatever the hell I want it to be! If I eat like a pig, my body will look like I’m a pig and if I’m a lazy ass and don’t exercise or take care of myself then my body will feel and look like shit. The only way to feel good and look good is to take care of yourself, on the inside and out. This is what I have been learning over the past few months.
When I started this “life style change” last June or July (off and on, I only got really dedicated to my change since about March 2012) I was tipping the scales at a whopping 345 pounds, the heaviest weight I have very been in my entire life. After meeting my Husband, falling in love and getting married, I was very comfortable and the weight just kept piling on. It was my worst nightmare. Then I woke up and realized that this was the perfect time in my life to make a wack load of changes and start doing positive things for my husband, kids and most importantly for me!
I have only just started this journey but I am very proud of myself for what I have accomplished so far. I have lost a total of 50 pounds to date and about 200 pounds of bad habits, destructive behavior, and self pity. I know I still have a long way to go but at this point in my life I feel happier than I have ever felt and I know it is only going to get better every day from here on in. I have left all those horrible self images and doubts about myself in the past and I am working towards a new amazing (and skinny) self image!
Diet Calendar Entries for 09 May 2012:
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1725 kcal
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Fat: 38.90g | Prot: 142.62g | Carb: 206.88g.
Breakfast: Fat Free Greek Yogurt, protein, Water, watermelon. Lunch: Hearts Of Palm (Canned), cheese, tomatoes, mayo, lettus, bread, chicken breast. Dinner: Soybeans (Mature Seeds, Steamed, Cooked), Sushi with Vegetables, Sunomono Salad. Snacks/Other: wheat thins, Large Coffee Double Double, Protein Diet Chocolate Mint Bar. more...
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5121 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Weight Training (moderate) - 1 hour, Bicycling (very fast) - 17.5/mph - 45 minutes, Resting - 14 hours and 15 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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