Ms Elizabeth's Journal, 05 April 2017

If you want to have an interesting week then I suggest you follow these steps:

1. Complain to a friend non-stop that the scale hates you and refuses to move and then send them pictures of your butt and ask them if they think it's too wide. Seriously.. I took BB pics. They are my before butt pictures. I will take AB (after butt) pics when I reach my goal. A girl has got to have priorities. Mine happen to be how much of a chair my butt takes up when I sit. Oooooh butt impressions! I should totally make a before butt, butt impression.

2. After this friend threatens to smack you upside the head with your scale if you don't stop obsessing then you can challenge them to figure out what you are doing wrong. I recommend you consider which friend you do this.. I chose a female body builder. She could kill me any number of ways with or without my scale. Make sure you are way too busy and live too far away from the insane friend for them to require you go to their gym especially if they are a body builder.

3. Follow the friends recommendations even if it seems an awful lot like the Keto Diet even though they keep insisting it isn't. It's a balanced diet.. that includes bulletproof coffee and lets me cook everything in butter.... Totally not complaining. And if this works well then who am I to say I know anything. Obviously I don't know anything because the freaking scale refuses to move and the youngest is 2-1/2. I can't exactly claim this is baby weight anymore.


Oh and crazy friend diet advice.. if your friend tells you to drink your bullet proof coffee over an hours time then do it. Even though you're in your car driving to a kids appointment and you're worried it will get cold and no one likes cold coffee.. just do it. Yes I know the coconut oil smells heavenly and the taste isn't nearly as bad as you thought it would be. Just follow the crazy friend advice... If you don't and you send her text with any complaints she will laugh at you for an entire day.. and probably then some.