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So as my husband is looking for a new place to live, I am looking for new ways to curb my calorie intake. I tried not to think about my marriage or lack there of today..went shopping with a friend and made healthy choices there.
I did get sucked into a hot dog while at Costco, but I made some good choices. They only carry Pepsi fountain drinks so I usually opt for the regular root beer, but I went against my "Pepsi Sucks" conviction and opted for its diet version and just a few sips. I usually eat a hot dog and half of my daughters pizza slice, too. Today i took a few bites of it and stopped. Could I have done so much better than that? Yes, but its baby steps and I am having grace for myself and where I am in life right now.
Later at Starbucks I really wanted something sweet so instead of a full-fat milk, white chocolate mocha complete with whip,and a tasty dessert, I opted for a skinny latte, no syrup, no whip and a little cake pop..they are yummy and it had 170 calories. Later I went to a birthday party, had a few bites of potato salad and a few bites of a pork rib and left it at that. I got home around 10pm and I was hungry and I had made a pot of 250 cal chili so I ate a small bowl of that with a few grapes and cherry tomatoes.
It was so strange I came home to a talkative husband who was trying to draw me in with a tv series we had watched and rented in the past. I wanted to pretend that all was well and sit with him and watch the show and just be, but that would be a lie. Its so easy to turn a blind eye, not hold to your boundries. Tonight I kept hold. I went to the bedroom and hung some laundry and am now writing you.. whoever is reading and I feel good, healthy in body, heart and mind. I'm sad, but I'm being true to myself and that is my comfort right now.
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