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I intend to own what I've done to gain last week so I'm not in denial or anything BUT I decided that different factors could have really changed my weight so I weighed again last night. I was actually expecting to see an even worse number but instead I got 195.2. I have no idea what that means. That's my lowest weigh yet, and I'm not sure I believe it. Focusing too much on the scale can be counterproductive. Honestly, the only way I'm going to be able to stay off the scale is if 1) I'm doing a really bad job of keeping up with my diet, then I will not want to see what it says OR 2) I take it out of my house entirely. I'm ashamed to admit I've been on it 5 times a day when I was really working hard and desperate for a small change.
So walking is the only exercise I am going to be able to do until my back stops hurting. It's been better than it was this weekend but it has kept me awake the past few nights. I've been up since 3am with the pain radiating down to my calf. They say walking is good but the lifting and tugging and chasing of children might not be. I can't get out without them right now and there's no such thing as no nonsense exercise when they're with me. I've been doing some stretches I read about online and it has seemed to help a little. I'm usually really flexible (fat and flexible seem like a funny mix) but I can barely straighten my leg at a 90 degree angle when laying on my back.
Seeing that number on the scales last night, even if it is not correct, made me feel different. It gave me a little more fire and pushed me forward. I'm tired of standing still, I really do want this. I don't want to be passive. I can't expect big changes unless I make big sacrifices and I haven't been as willing to do that lately as I was before. So I'm going to search out motivation DAILY. If I don't, I will not keep up the momentum.
Diet Calendar Entry for 23 April 2013:
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422 kcal
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Fat: 12.94g | Prot: 9.57g | Carb: 65.95g.
Breakfast: Peter Pan Creamy Peanut Butter, Sara Lee Honey Wheat Bread, Banana, Coffee-Mate French Vanilla Liquid Coffee Creamer, Coffee (Brewed From Grounds). more...
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