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Okay, I'm ready to come back and admit. I've been eating poorly and not exercising. I don't know what happened. That is what I mean when I say that I can't skip a day of exercise. I can't have one day where I eat what I want. I don't have enough self control, it's all or nothing with me. The only good thing in this is that I haven't gained any weight back....but I don't see how I haven't. I fell off the grid, I guess because I didn't want to log all of the horrible things I was eating. I am currently at 197 and I guess I am going to make this my "starting point" now. It's like starting all over again. I could have lost more weight by now but I stopped trying. I hope this is a lesson learned and I stay on a super strict plan from now on. My brother in law has lost over 50 lbs and he asked me last week how my weight loss was going. Um....its not. I was ashamed to say it but it's true. He has not lost it in a healthy way though. I was trying to do it sensibly and not starve myself. I just got really obsessive about eating. It was on my mind 24/7, I was seeing the break down chart of carbs/fats/protein in my sleep. I don't know what it is I need but it seems like I'm either all in, obsessive and crazy about it or absolutely horrible and eating anything I want. Got to find a balance!! It's harder than it sounds, for me anyway.
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