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Up and Down Up and Down. I don't know which is worst the weight fluctuation or the telling myself it's time to start again. I know it is really not starting again it is continuing the process but it is such a long road.
Yesterday was the family reunion and I felt like all I did was cry all day. All I seemed to focus on were the people that died in the past year. 3 people which is a huge amount for a family as small as ours. My youngest could not be here as she now lives in Denver and started a new job lst Monday. My oldest and her family were there and that was great as were some of my favorite cousins. But some weren't, with lame excuses. All I could focus on were those who couldn't be there and resent those who could and chose not to. I have got to get a grip.
I am going to Kansas City tomorrow to shop and yes... eat. I know I can make good choices but probably will justify not by saying this is the last day and I will start fresh Tuesday for whatever stupid reason I come up with. Even my calendar reflects this. I just hope I'm not a downer to the others going as we have looked forward to this for quite a while.
My friends and family as well as my buddies on this site are AMAZINGLY supportive so now I need to take that support and start anew and accomplish something this time. After the past year to embark on a healthy plan would be fitting.
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I know sometimes it's hard,but, don't give up on yourself. You do have support,lots of it. Try to focus on all the good things and just let go of the bad. That seems to be something a lot of have been dealing with.
Have fun in KC! You will make good choices and will feel good about doing it!
Look forward to hearing about your trip! Be careful and shop til ya drop!!LOL!
13 Jun 10 by member: candyann
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Oh, I've been there. The constant wanting to change but not committing to it or procrastinating. Dig deep down and find that determination to change and take care of yourself. Take the first step and then take another and another...you've got to get started and don't look back. If you mess up, take another step in the right direction! Hope this doesn't sound preachy, trying to help!
17 Jun 10 by member: kimbulie
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