Ceebee's Journal, 24 May 2010

Ok.. I have accepted that I am not going to be under 200 by my daughters birthday.. June 11. Sadly I have had to lose the same 5 lbs 3 times now.. if it were not for those monkey shines.. I would have made it. I quit smoking and today is the first day... I am really unhappy right now and I really really really want to smoke super bad. I never smoked alot because I would never smoke in front of my kids.. so I would get up early and have one before they got up then another at nap time and several after they went to bed at night. On a regular day I would only have like 5 or 6.. and If I went out I would smoke a whole pack. I don't smoke in our house.. so I am like a sneaky little teenager hiding around a corner... I have been scared to quit because I don't want to struggle with eating more from the not smoking. Today I have been keeping busy with laundry and baths.. so I am barely doing ok.. but after I drop my son off at school and my daughter lays down for a nap.. it is going to be tough. I wish that I did not enjoy them so much.. but I do. :P

Diet Calendar Entry for 24 May 2010:
1893 kcal Fat: 55.09g | Prot: 107.48g | Carb: 264.14g.   Breakfast: skim milk, scooter o's. Lunch: apple, canned chicken breast, fat free cheese slice, watermelon, lettuce, low fat mayo, black forest ham, slimwiches. Dinner: asparagus, fat free cheese slice, slimwiches, turkey burger, ground beef. Snacks/Other: key lime pie. more...

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When I quit smoking I started the Couch to 5K program, thinking I would trade one habit for another. I was 185 pounds, 36 years old, had smoked for about 20 years and had been very sedentary. I think the program started with 30 seconds or a minute of running and then a couple minutes of walking. I had to adapt the program to my ability which meant starting at 15 seconds of running for 3-4 minutes of walking. It took me about 6 months to actually complete the program, which should take 3 or 4 months. But I did it. And I have been running ever since. Can't say I really enjoy the process, but I feel great every time I complete a run. If you decide to try it, I'd recommend you sign up for a 5k that's about 4-6 months from your start date. Knowing I'd signed up gave me motivation to continue. It's even better if you have a friend to do the program with and the race. Since completing the C25K program, I've run many races, including a marathon and I've done a few triathlons. I never believed I would be able to do any of this. I'm not fast, I don't "compete", I'm just there to finish the distance and earn a feeling of personal satisfaction. Anyway, my point I guess, is that trading one habit for another really helped. It might work for you too. I wish you the best! 
24 May 10 by member: Playwright
CB, I used to do the same thing - sneaking around the corner of the house to have a smoke, and then my kids coming out looking for me and I'd run and hide from them. LOL. It was just like a teenager. They found a pack in my car and I actually lied to my kids saying they belonged to a friend from work. That was so sad. When I made the decision to get healthy, it included stopping smoking and eating better. I feel so much better now that I don't have to sneak around and I can honestly say that I don't smoke to my kids and to anyone else who may ask. I did it on pure will power (I have quit 3 times for exteneded periods of time, each time without help - just so I could say I could do it). But that is not for everyone. Go get yourself some chantix or something to help if you need it. There is nothing wrong with that. I also know people who have had great success with accupressure from a chiropractor to quit smoking. The goal here is to be healthy - that's not just diet - stop putting poison into your body on all levels. Good luck to you! I know you can do it!! 
24 May 10 by member: tglenna
I wish I could give you some helpful advice on smoking. I'm not a smoker and the times I tried, it was pretty easy to quit. All I know to do is to keep thinking about the reason you want to quit. My pastor says (and he uses this in reference to living for God) if you can do it for 1 minute, you can do it for 2 minutes. If you can do it for 1 hr, you can do it 2 hrs. If you can do it for 1 day, you can do it for two days. If you can do it or 1 month, you can do it for 2 months, etc. I've always thought it would be easier to quit smoking than losing weight. Because smoking, you don't have to buy cigarettes. You can't just give up food. Kwim? But, an addiction is an addiction. I am not ignorant to that fact. Hang in there sweetie. Just take it minute by minute. Keep in mind that both my parent's were smokers. They both quit. Although, my dad later picked it up again but hid it from my mom. He passed away in '98 from lung cancer. My grandpa (his dad) died in '90 from the same disease. I don't believe everyone gets cancer from smoking, but I do believe that some people are more likely to get it from genetics. (((((HUGS)))))) I wish you the best on this next step towards a healthy body! 
24 May 10 by member: kcook323
As a former smoker I can sympathize with you and what you are going through. For me, it was a series of excuses though. I couldn't quit smoking until I'd lost a bunch of weight (just in case) and I couldn't lose weight because I was still smoking and too out of breath to exercise. You have already laid the foundation, now it's time to get your butt in gear, suck it up and just do it. Quitting is so hard but all you have to do is get through the first day. The first day sucks so bad that when you make it to day 2, you tell yourself, "I'm not going to smoke because I NEVER want to have to go through day 1 all over again!". You can do it and you will be so happy when you do. Just tell yourself, "I am a NON smoker" not "I'm trying to quit smoking". I AM a NON smoker!!! Good luck dear! 
24 May 10 by member: jenju
Jenju, I did the same thing. Had the same excuses, and had to just do it, and I too would say outloud, I AM a NONsmoker. =)  
24 May 10 by member: Playwright

     
 

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