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It's time for a little self TLC for the next few days.
After waking up the last few mornings as a giant stress ball, I've come to two decisions. The first is that I need a massage. I actually signed up for a membership where I get a massage a month but I can't wait until the end of the month since I'm a stress ball. My sanity is totally worth the price (especially as I won't be able to work if I lose it completely, I haven't been that productive this week.) So I'm going tomorrow night after work. I'm looking forward to it and hoping it might also help that shin injury that keeps popping up when I jog.
The other realization is that I HAVE to take some time a day to decompress and recenter. I've been busy and being busy isn't bad but being so busy that I can't get myself on track IS. I've lost my center and I've been running around freaking out and that's not something I can keep doing. By this, I mean, I literally can NOT keep running around freaking out like this all the time since I know that this leads nowhere good for me. (A decade of experience taught me that the hard way.) Which means, I have to pre-empt things now before I have some kind of stress-induced meltdown. So back to the self-care thing I mentioned above. I've decided I am taking tomorrow off from school work. No opening books, no writing papers, not even THINKING about what I have to do. I have no dire deadlines and I NEED a break from this.
I'm working tomorrow, obviously, but once I leave my plans include dinner, the massage and maybe something completely fun and mindless like playing computer games or wii. Oh, and sleep. Definitely sleep. Definitely a full NIGHT of sleep. I need one good night of sleep to reset things.
I mentioned earlier that I seem to have plateaued. I'm not sure if this is the normal every few weeks being stuck or this is just because I'm so stressed that my body is reacting to the massive courses of adrenaline and preparing for battle. My pants (the ones that wouldn't zip in July) seem to be getting a little looser lately, so I have no idea. I'm hoping that the scale being stuck is just because my digestion has been wonky with stress but we'll see.
Anyway, I can do this. I will do this. But I need to rest. I need to rest first so I can recharge. My body needs it and more importantly my mind needs it. At some point I'll be better at juggling where I won't get this stressed from being overly busy. For the circumstances wherein the last three months I started a new job and what amounts to a full courseload of grad school (and summer class finals before that), I'm actually doing ridiculously well. I took on a lot at once - in retrospect too much for the circumstances. What can I say though? I've always been ridiculously ambitious. Still, I don't have anything absolutely pressing for the next week at least so there's some time to get things in order and back to a more even keel.
Affirmations for today:
1) I don't need to worry about the end of the semester and beyond right now. I need to be focused and live fully in the present.
2) There's nothing weak or wrong about taking time to rest and slowing down
3) I deserve special care after going through a rough time. I absolutely should lavish some extra care on myself in times like these.
4) Resting is not the same thing as quitting.
Diet Calendar Entries for 13 October 2010:
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1551 kcal
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Fat: 26.86g | Prot: 106.91g | Carb: 229.49g.
Breakfast: Milk (Nonfat), Women's Multivitamin, Greek Style Nonfat Yogurt - Blueberry, No Calorie Sweetener Packets, Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Bagel Thins - Everything, Cheese Wedges. Lunch: Apples, Light String Cheese, Sliced Lite Provolone Cheese, Bottled Water, Oven Roasted Turkey Breast, 100% Whole Grain Fiber Bread. Dinner: Milk (Nonfat), Sugar Free Vanilla Syrup, Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Baby Carrots, 100% Whole Grain Fiber Bread, Sliced Lite Provolone Cheese, Oven Roasted Turkey Breast, Light String Cheese, Apples. Snacks/Other: TLC Fruit & Grain Bars - Pumpkin Pie, green tea mints, Chamomile Tea (Brewed), No Calorie Sweetener Packets, Bottled Water. more...
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3578 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Shopping - 15 minutes, Housework - 30 minutes, Driving - 1 hour and 35 minutes, Sleeping - 6 hours, Resting - 4 hours, Calisthenics (light, e.g. home exercise) - 10 minutes, Sitting - 30 minutes, Desk Work - 11 hours. more...
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