debbra's Journal, 18 May 2017

My one year old puppy was killed yesterday. She was playing in our backyard, and I heard her screaming and struggling from behind the bushes. And then she was gone. We searched everywhere. But we saw two hawks hovering about a half hour later, and we heard an owl. We had fortified our fence with chicken wire, and I believed the raccoons or coyotes couldn't get in. We live on the top of a canyon and have a lot of brush and bushes. So I thought our dogs were not visible to predators. Now I know that was stupid. I'm numb, but I did a lot of crying yesterday. And now I'm emotionally drained and exhausted. I have had no appetite. This is not the diet I wanted. I just wanted to record my experience here for my own sake, to get it out of me, although this is draining me as well. My two dogs are the first dogs I've ever had, due to allergy in my family when I was growing up. So this is a painfully new experience for me. I know dogs don't live forever, and I don't want to complain. I'm thankful that she died quickly. I'm sure I heard her last moments as the sounds ended abruptly. She was a sweetheart, happy, spirited little baby. And I miss her terribly. Rest in Peace, my little Lucy.

Diet Calendar Entry for 18 May 2017:
947 kcal Fat: 59.16g | Prot: 64.76g | Carb: 35.07g.   Breakfast: Equal Sweeteners (Aspartame) Packets, Whole Milk, Nescafe Taster's Choice Hazelnut Roast Instant Coffee. Lunch: Benecol Regular Vegetable Oil Spread, Brie Cheese, Whole Foods Market Cranberry Tuna Salad. Dinner: Plain Matzo, Lamb. more...

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Comments 
Hugs hugs hugs.....so sorry! 
18 May 17 by member: SjF60
I am so terribly sad to hear of your loss. I had a friend who lived in a remote area in Arizona and also lost her small dog to either a hawk or eagle. Blessings. 
18 May 17 by member: HCB
So sorry for your loss. I know it hurts! 
18 May 17 by member: Horseshu1
I am so sorry, pets are family members and their loss is painful! Hang in there! 
18 May 17 by member: skwhite
Sorry to hear of your loss..I know times like these are especially difficult to deal with..!  
18 May 17 by member: Snooky2
Been there. It hurts. Hugs to you! 
18 May 17 by member: smprowett
I'm so very sorry, Debbra <3 <3 <3  
19 May 17 by member: fjasmine
So, so, sorry for your loss.  
19 May 17 by member: Gerdgal
Oh no Been there So sorry for your loss 
19 May 17 by member: poppycom
That is so sad. We've lost many dogs over the years, fortunately all were due to old age. Every loss hurts as much as the first. 
19 May 17 by member: ApacheTiger37
Im very sorry to hear about the loss of your dog. Praying for comfort and peace for you. 
19 May 17 by member: Kingbiz
So sorry to hear. Its an anguish to realize a predator has taken your pet and feel you somehow were not vigilant enough. My cat got picked off the roof by a hawk and it took a long time before I forgave myself. Don't blame yourself for this. A hungry raptor will find a way to feed itself and it's young. That's nature in its most cruel reality.  
19 May 17 by member: MCslimmer
My thoughts and prayers are with you Debbra, it's hard enough watching our 4 legged family members get old and watch them deteriorate but you know they had a good life and you try to prepare yourself. To have one taken from you with out warning is so heartbreaking, and at such a young age, I'm so sorry. 
19 May 17 by member: rubytaylor
ss😢💔 
19 May 17 by member: hamorr
I am so sorry that is so sad. Praying for you. I know it must be hard. Lean on your friends/family for support. It's ok to let it out. Maybe write about it or have a little memorial. ❤️ 
22 May 17 by member: KB Cutie
I'm so sorry for your loss! 
22 May 17 by member: Fifi Bonbon
Animals are like our children. I have lost both I understand completely. So sorry, only time makes it better. 
22 May 17 by member: Nancilaw
I've been looking for her in the shelters, walking the hillside, even though I'm pretty sure she was taken by a predator because I could hear her cries. I hope against hope that she just got lost or even that she was taken by a person. Maybe she's playing happily somewhere. I just can't stop looking. 
23 May 17 by member: debbra
Hang in there and keep your lovely memories of your dog. It is sooo painful to lose your buddy! My heart goes out to you. I have had many dogs throughout my life but the first that was "just mine", trained from a puppy, died a year ago. I still feel his loss and miss him terribly. When it hurts really bad I try to remember all the sad or rough days he helped me through and find comfort that I had him for those. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you grieve. Take care! 
23 May 17 by member: Mom bear
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