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**RAYOR** Serious ranting ahead...and some of it's not nice.
Blah. I've had a headache for like 3 weeks now. I *think* it's because I've been eating more carbs. In an effort to bring up my cals, I'm adding things that just ARENT good for my body. I've been trying everything to get rid of them, ( the headaches) and nothing is working. I'm thinking it has to be the carbs. This week I'm going back to my basics. back to where I first started this journey. Hopefully once I get the crap out of my body my headaches will start going away. I feel like I did before i started my eating plan. yes, I'm still losing weight, but eating this crap is just NOt worth it for me. i wish i could be like others who can eat carbs and feel good, but i can't. YUCK. I was just trying to bring up my cals...and i read all of these food diarys with carbs and people still losing weight. i thought i would give it a try...as long as my cals were still within my range. Not such a good idea. I've given it a fair go and now it's time to go back to my low carb eating.
I received an email last week from someone telling me that i focus too much on losing 'lbs' and that I push others to focus on that too. That I should be focusing on 'being healthy' and it shouldn't matter how many actual 'lbs' I lose. UMMMMmmmm.....ok. let me respond to that.
I have ALOT of weight to lose and if I want to focus on how many freaking POUNDS I lose...that SO F'N WHAT. This persons highest weight was 1freakin50. OK, so maybe to her she is a big fat person, but I REALLY AM A FREAKIN FAT PERSON!!!! Try weighing 375 and then tell me I focus to much on losing actual freaking lbs!! I don't even get that. I'm not even going to try. This person is NOT my friend and has NEVER commented on ANY of my journals. I checked. SO MISS 150....kiss my big fat AZZ. I don't care if anyone thinks I'm being to harsh. This is my freaking journal. My feelings got really hurt when i first read that email/PM. NOW I'm just mad.
I try really hard to support others on here. i know how hard it is to lose weight when you don't have a support system. I'm sory to ANYONE I may have made feel bad or for focusing to much on the 'lbs'. I just wanted to say that, in case I really have done that. That was never my intention and I'm sorry if I came across that way.
Anyway, that's all i have right now.
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21 to 40 of 56
 Comments
lauren~You WILL get to your goal. =) I don't think there is anything wrong with being mindful of our weight once we all hit our goals. It will help us STAY there.
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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Good morning, Dawn...I just read your journal entry, and have to say that IMHO you have every reason to rant...seriously, it's one thing to talk to a friend and say something like that (I never would, to me what we focus on is a personal choice and if it motivates you to go on then it can't be a bad thing, right?), but to do so to a complete stranger???? REALLY?? Well, I am pretty sure they may be projecting as Lauren said. And yes, as serafano said "I also HATE when people say to put the scale away and that your weight doesn't matter. That may be true for thin people, But for us fatties, we need to lose POUNDS!"...lol...I so hear that, and I haven't lost any in a year!! But I am still here and still working at it...as long as we do that we are winners (or losers, as it were, ;) )
15 Nov 11 by member: ctlss
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I agree with what you just said lauren. But i think it's all about the type of person you are. i totally agree that people shouldn't focus on the 'scale' when they let it dictate their emotions. Some people can't weigh in every day or even every week. They get all depressed and usually blow their eating. Then we have some people, like you, who are losing inches and the scale doesn't reflect that. I think the scale can be evil, as, and lets keep it real, it really CAN mess with your head. You eat really good all week and exercise and drink your water...but you get on that stupid thing and see either a gain or a it stays the same. Now, there could be a million reasons WHY it says that, muscle growth, water weight, haven't taken a good potty lately...hormone flucuations...so many things.BUT, you don't think about all of those things and you get down on yourself. I know ehen I first started this, I freakin hated the scale. I did what so many people do. I let it take over my life. in THAT case, I really feel the scale is BAD. But I have learned to appreciate my flucuations and learn how my body reacts on a daily basis. I personally HAVE to weigh myself every day. It's part of my routine. Good or bad. It's what i do. It holds me accountable. Not everyone can do that, and again, I feel it's all about the person. I think this subject is very important to talk about, because so many people starting out get discouraged and end up quitting because of the scale. maybe i will start a group...LOL =)
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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Ctlss~ Good Morning to YOU! Thank you so much for your comment! All any of us can do is to keep trying, and you are right, if we continue to do that we ALL are winners!! I honestly was kind of surprised someone sent me a message like the one Miss 150 sent. LOL...but really, people will be people. I hope you have a great day!
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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Sera~ When I first read that email, I automatically thought of you and thought maybe I was being to 'number' focused with you. It even made me delete a comment I left for you on one of your journals. But, you and I are alike when it comes to the scale. We take it for what it is and just try to get the numbers to go lower. I do apologize, though, if i came off that way. All i ever wabted to do was to encourage you. THAT is the only thing about that email that really upset me. =) and you are right!! Skinny B*TCHES really DO need to mind their business! LOL
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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Jen~ Thank you so much!!!
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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Oh I weigh myself every day - I only record my lows, so it could be weeks before I ever weigh in lol, but I have also gone a month with out weighing (hardest month ever), I did it because it was making me angry, and that is no way to live. I now my fluctuations, infact I know them so well I can weigh myself at night before I go to bed and I can guess exactly what I will weigh in the morning because I have learned learned them, and I think people do need to learn this, I know what foods make me retain water, I know my hormon fluctuations etc. Had you told me a year ago I would be able to tell when I was ovulating (sorry TMI) by my weight on the scale I would have called you a damn fool.. now not so much. I don't even need to track my cycle anymore because the scale tells me, so when last week rolled around and I jumped up over 210 I didn't even panic, well I did for a min, than I remembered what day it was and just wrote it off. I honestly feel that FS is not a place for skinny ppl - if you lost weight and are at goal thats different, but if you weight 125 pounds(pulled this number out of my ass) and you want to get fit - there are other sites out there that are directly more related to fitness, not to say that if you are 5 pounds over weight that you shouldn't lose those 5 pounds, god knows I wish I had BUT I think at that point you should focus on getting fit and building muscle rather just losing the weight.
15 Nov 11 by member: phsmalls
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Ok this is prob going to offend some, BUT it's how I really feel. i don't think FS is a place for skinny peeps either. Ok, let me rephrase...i don't think skinny people honestly have the right to comment on journals about how someone is doing something wrong, or focusing to much ont he scale or really for anything unless it's support. Unless they have lost at least 25lbs. If they only have to lose like 5 ot 10 lbs, get the hell off my journal. You have NO idea what I'm feeling or am going through. NOW. that may piss some people off. Oh well. I don't try to understand someone working out a butt-load or someone going through gastric bypass...because I've NOt gone through those things and don't have a CLUE as to how they feel. Same with skinny peeps trying to understand needing to lose over 150 freaking lbs. My GF has a terrible time understanding how I'm feeling, becasue she has never been fat. So i don't really talk to her about my thoughts, or feelings...becasue she doesn't have a clue...and honestly...i get irritated because she deminishes how hard it can be. Don't do that to me. Or anyone undergoing this journey. i will jump all over your butt faster then anything. I'm sure the 'skinnies' mean well, but there is NO WAY can they can understand unless they have been in the same shoes. Ok, so maybe this subject bothers me. LOL i think it's so great you are so in tune with your body Lauren. More people should be. I really think it would help the overall process.
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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LOL we are totally on the same page. I do like to get feedback from people who have lost a lot of weight and are at or near goal, they understand, they have been there, they get it. I also do not like when people look at a food diary and tell you what you are doing wrong - WHEN YOU DO NOT ASK FOR HELP!!! lol It is one of those things, if clean eating is working for you awesome, if you can do no processed fantastic, if you are a veghead more power to you, etc. etc. etc. If I ask for someone to give me ideas its a different story. I also hate when people say that carb intolerences are not real, they are, I have one, its medical, its been proven, STFU Carbs are not the enemy, I get it, BUT Processed carbs in breads and pastas make me feel like I drank a bottle of rum and a bottle of tequilla (don't ask how I know how that feels lol) its not pretty, I look like shite,and I feel like something you would scrap off your shoe. People need to understand that no one is exactly the same, that what you are doing isn't going to work for someone else. Oh and while I am on this topic... eating less than 1200 calories a day does work for some WITH OUT putting them into starvation mode, of course if they are going to do something like this they should be under the care of a medical professional BUT there is no real scientific proof that everyone needs to eat 1200+ Calories - I asked my Dr, who asked nutritionist for me and they both agreeed that due to health problems the metabolism may slow down to the point that 1200 calories is too high.
15 Nov 11 by member: phsmalls
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YES we ARE on the same page. the whole carb thing really irritates me. That is why i really don't comment on eating low carb anymore. People honestly need to wrry about THEMSELVES and what THEY eat and not stick their nose in everyone elses biz. I, myself, suffer from carb intolerance. I just proved it to myself, yet a-freaking-gain these past 3 weeks. I can NOT eat carbs. At least not above 50 on a everyday basis. having a 3 week migraine is NOt fun. I have tried EVERYthing out there to get rid of them, and eating less carbs works. SO, there is NOT A SOUL out there will be able to convince me that there is no such thing as 'carb intolerance'. Diff things work for diff people, plain and simple. I hate when people try to stuff their 'plan' down your throat. if I didn't ask, please don't preach to me. YES, some things are said our of concern...and I appreciate that. BUT. telling me what I'm doing is wrong is NOT the way to get me to try something different. as a matter of fact, it's going to make me dig in my heels and become the most stubborn women around. =) I have MANy views on the under 1200 cals thing.....LOL....BUT I won't go there in this open journal. Suffice it to say, I agree with you.
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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I am also carb intolerant, and those that say there is no such thing, well, they simply are blessed. I am reading wheat belly, and it would appear that I also have some intolerance to gluten...yay, yet something else I need to be careful about. Sigh...wouldn't it be great to just eat what the heck we want and not have to think about these things? lol
15 Nov 11 by member: ctlss
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Ctlss~ I totally wish we were able to do that. having to be careful what you eat for diet reasons as well as health reasons totally sucks!! Good things alot of things with gluten also have carbs...might make it a bit easier for you. I have a sis in law who can't eat gluten. It's crazy how much food can affect our health and well being without us even knowing it sometimes.
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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From what I have read (haven't read wheat belly - yet) it is not uncommon to have a Carb intolerance accompanied by a gluten allergy too. I have also read that much like a nut or metal allergy you can become more intolerant as time goes on so if you do not have such an intolerance now you could develop one over time. The fact that wheat has changed so much over time tells me that its not nearly as natural as it used to be. I try to stick with foods that are as natural as possible however after discovering a freezer full of food I forgot I had I will be eating as much of that in the next month as possible - need to make room for my food hamper that arrives next month lol.
15 Nov 11 by member: phsmalls
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I think food overall isn't as natural as it used to be. makes me really think twice about what i eat. Ok, so...what is a food hamper?
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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I get them every year at christmas... its boxes of food delivered to my door, so I don't have to buy groceries for a month or 2 really... unless I forget about it. I think I pay 15 bucks a week and at the end of the year I get all kinds of good food - frozen meats, veggies, fruits stuff like that, there is a whole array. its nice if you are having a family dinner because you don't have to spend a crazy amount on food on top of gifts and everything.
15 Nov 11 by member: phsmalls
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that is so cool! I don't think we have that here. At least, i haven't ever heard of it. That is such a great idea. =) Do you usually cook Christmas dinner or go to your moms? I'm cooking Thanksgiving but not Christmas unless my grouchy father decides he doesn't want to go to my sis house
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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It is usually cooked by my grandma or my aunt but the hampers do come in handy because i have a fairly good sized family and Christmas is always tight because there are birthdays in december as well, so the only groceries I generally have to buy are milk/eggs/produce and thats it, really cuts back on the bills.
15 Nov 11 by member: phsmalls
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Dec is THE BEST month for a Birthday as far as I'm concerned. =) I wish my grandma was still alive. We had the best time at her house for Christmas. =( That's nice you have so much family around you. =)
15 Nov 11 by member: HerStrawberri
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My Birthday is in December, I shared it with my grandfather that passed almost 11 years ago. Most of the time I don't mind a Dec birthday but I do have some family that try to cheap out and combine my birthday and Xmas presents together - it pisses me off lol My nieces birthday is January 1 they try it with her too and she is like me it irritates her and she is only 6 - my mom actually has a rule that my family cannot wrap my birthday presents in christmas paper and they cannot combine the 2 of them into one unless its something big. I love having majority of my family close, I do have family all over tho but my immediate family actually all lives with in an hour of each other. and well I live with 2 of 3 brothers so we see eachother all the time lol
15 Nov 11 by member: phsmalls
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Ok I'm totally coming in at the end of this, but my birthday is also in December. 2 weeks before Christmas so I too have experienced family that has tried to combine my gifts. It's just not fair! and Dawn I just wanted to say that you are doing an awesome job and you have every right to rant. An email like that was sent to me a few months ago and it totally turned me off from this site. I'm trying to make my way back though.
15 Nov 11 by member: britt-a-knee
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