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10 September 2015

There's nothing like getting a boost of confidence from seeing your own shadow.

Last week I wrote about getting depressed over my skirt not fitting right. I started feeling better about it over the next few days - because, honestly, the results are there.

I decided to go walk the beltline on Labor Day. I felt good except for the fact that I'm usually running on the beltline, so I was feeling some guilt. But out of nowhere I noticed my shadow - a fine sexy shadow at that. I mean yes my stomach is still big and my butt's not going anywhere, but that's just the shape I've always been at all sizes. The awesome thing was that there was just a lot less of me.

I confirmed that it wasn't just a good angle from the sun. The storefront windows showed a much smaller reflection too.

I guess I just needed a few days out of the gym to realize that I was starting to obsess about results to the point where I wasn't seeing them even when they were clearly there all along.


02 September 2015

I feel depressed today. I had an amazing day yesterday, and even saw myself in a snapchat that my coworker snuck of me and I looked good sitting and standing. This morning I planned to wear my polkadot shirt tucked into my highwaist skirt with a thin belt for a pop of color.

After an amazing core workout today, I got ready for my outfit. I got depressed when I still had to suck my belly in to close the skirt and it still stretched tightly over my lower tummy. I became embarrassed wondering what I looked like in it before. I got depressed wondering if I had made any progress at all. I never put the belt on and untucked my shirt for coverage.

I know I have made progress. I know I can go in any store and try on a 14 and it either fit or be too big. This time last year size 14 used to fit or be too small. I can wear a L in everything in Old Navy. I can wear a 14 even if clothes in that store run a little small.

I love that I can eat clean whole foods without worry. I know that I can see progress all over my body. I don't know, I think it's the lack of physical contact telling my brain that know one even wants to love you at this size. Oh they want to screw you, but they don't really want to hold you and melt into you, and take comfort in your soft curves.

I did get a sweaty hug from my work crush who started working out at my gym yesterday. But he's not mine, so I limit the physical contact. Sigh... It's just an unusual day; I don't normally feel like this. So I just need to acknowledge the feeling and let it pass.


28 August 2015

Hey FS!!! I have no idea what I weigh right now since the scale was really making me mad after putting in so much effort at the gym, but I've finally started to see some progress in my body. I'm still faithfully going to the gym, increasing my running speed, and making gains all around.

I'm still vegan. Although, I got into a trap of eating vegan convenience foods and vegan junk. I thought that I had gained weight because of the lifting I was doing at the gym, but I sat down with myself to get a reality check.

1. I was only fluctuating up and down the same 3-5 pounds in the beginning, but I changed my eating thinking that I was doing something wrong.
2. I was doing well while lifting until my family vacation in May when I introduced chips and convenience foods into my diet.
3. Chips are a weakness and a trigger for other snacks.
4. Convenience vegan meals are a trigger for eating out and other non-whole foods.
5. My workouts weren't enough to keep up with the junk I was putting in, so that's where 10 pounds of weight gain really came from.

So, about 3 weeks ago I went back to making sure I cooked from home, putting away the chips, quinoa quinoa quinoa (no rice because it's inflammatory in my body). I started performing better at the gym and running faster. My tummy started flattening out and my side started to come back in.

I wore an old body shaper under a dress a few weeks ago and now I see why people are so obsessed with waist trainers. Not sure I'll ever by a waist trainer but it was so cool to see how sexy my midsection looked the next morning. Now I've been wearing it every time I wear a dress or something dressy-ish at work.

Okay, that's enough for now. Onward...

30 June 2015

26 June 2015

Weigh-in: 187.8 lb lost so far: 8.2 lb still to go: 13.8 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   (7 comments) on diet sngglebnny's own diet   losing 3.5 lb a week

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