Register
|
Sign In
Search in:
Foods
Recipes
Meals
Exercises
Members
My FatSecret
Foods
Recipes
Challenges
Fitness
Community
Community
Members
Zaleya
Journal
Zaleya's Journal
Zaleya's Profile
|
Send a Message
|
Weight History
showing entries 1 to 5 of 5
18 July 2013
Weigh-in:
290.0 lb
lost so far:
0 lb
still to go:
10.0 lb
Diet followed N/A
add comment
27 March 2013
So for the last 3 days I have been off my plan - I have still counted calories and on 2 of the days I was under 2000, but all the foods I was eating were for the express purpose of controlling the anxiety that exploded when I started my food plan.
For the first few days it was slightly manageable, and then I was having an anxiety attack every day. Right now my OCD is really bad - and the worst thing is all I need to do to make it go away is binge eat. The dopamine with flood my brain and I will fell human - at least for a couple hours.
This process has lead me to being the weight I am now however - and I owe it to myself to get to 200 pounds. And even though I have only lost 7 pounds so far, I am already sleeping better, thank God.
add comment
21 March 2013
I changed my medication a couple weeks ago - and ever since I have been overwhelmingly anxious and my OCD has gotten really bad. It keeps me up all night. This is not uncommon when starting a new drug, and I am hoping it will die down in a couple weeks.
In the mean time, the only successful way of taming my agitated nerves in the past has been food. Eating (especially sugar and simple carbs) releases a bunch of dopamine and serotonin into my brain and I reach a relaxed, calm state of being. At least temporarily. Then I crash and I go from anxious to deeply depressed. Then I eat again to counteract the effects. This is how I became 300 pounds.
Keeping to my food plan (which involves both calorie counting and fewer simple sugars) means my agitation is through the roof. It is like electric shocks all over my nerves all the time, it is exhausting.
add comment
21 March 2013
I am nervously happy about the progress of my weightloss, given the state of my anxiety especially. It has been 6 months since I have been able to access my motivation in a meaningful way. But now I am terrified of fucking this up.
Damn anxiety.
(1 comment)
20 March 2013
Ok, this is horrible, but I think it is safe to say I can attribute my weightloss to the fact I ate about 700 calories yesterday, because I spent most of the day asleep.
I know this is not healthy or useful - for one thing it cannot be repeated since generally one needs to be conscious, and then would need to eat several times a day to maintain energy. It would be tempting to just sleep 24 hours and not eat, and burn calories by the virtue that I am so big, that just keeping me alive expends a lot of calories.
The problem is sleep apnea. Naptime has always been a big part of my life since college. I slept through a couple semesters there when I was at my most depressed. I would wake up, wander over to the cafeteria for a high carbohydrate, insulin spiking breakfast (croissant and orange juice was my favorite) have a sugar crash and go back to bed.
Though cuddling on my soft soft sheets and reading a book has been a big pasttime since I became unemployed (in January) I can recognize right now when I take a nap it is from genuine fatigue. Unfortunately, it is a result of sleep apnea. And the only way to get rid of it is to lose weight.
Even though I get a solid 8 hours every night I am not experiencing real REM sleep. I decided to see if there was a temporary way to help while I lose weight, so I googled it, and it scared the crap out of me.
Sleep-disordered breathing is associated with an increased risk of cardiovascular disease, stroke, high blood pressure, arrhythmias, diabetes, and sleep deprived driving accidents.[22][23][24][25] When high blood pressure is caused by OSA, it is distinctive in that, unlike most cases of high blood pressure (so-called essential hypertension), the readings do not drop significantly when the individual is sleeping.[26] Stroke is associated with obstructive sleep apnea.[27]
While this sounds bad, what is scarier is after years and years of not getting enough oxygen to your brain you get stupider. Your memory is affected. This terrifies me - My memory has gotten worse as I have gotten older (not odd, except I am 29). I have always chocked this up to the fact that long term antidepressant use leads to a weaker memory. The fact that these two forces are weakening my brain is scary as f*%k.
Which turns out to be a fairly good motivator for losing weight.
add comment
Other Related Links
Members
Members
Forums
Zaleya's weight history
view complete history