Welcome aboard. Start coming up with a plan. Failure to plan is planning to fail. Identify your hurdles, and come up with a plan to bypass. Forgive yourself for your past behaviour. You're a good person, and it's time to take some time for you - so you can be around for those who need you. You won't be perfect, but just because you have a flat tire does not mean you get out and slash the other three. So don't "throw the day away" because you ate a twinkie. Look at what you were doing, feeling, etc and learn from your mistakes. It's not the first cookie, it's the 10th. You can do this. Stay motivated. Write down your goals (make them measureable) and review them on a regular basis.