analisa1968's Journal, 20 November 2014

If you're having problems sticking to you food goals, get better at planning your meals ahead of time. It takes time and effort, but it's worth it. Best of luck. 

I do what I can when I can and I try not to beat myself up afterwards. Take every meal or snack one step at a time and just do the best you can. Just take care of yourself. 

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. This is a stressful time of year anyway, try to pamper yourself a little if possible. Pat yourself on the back when you do well, and be compassionate with yourself when you stumble. Virtual hugs: {{hugs}} 

Analisa1968, there is nothing wrong with you. Don't get down on yourself. We've all been there. So If you mess up, just forget about it, dont dwell on it and beat yourself up about it. Just start again...one day at a time baby one day at a time. I read an article yesterday that said don't try to change your life, because thats to big of a chunk to take on suddenly, just try to change your day. Which means just decide to make some small changes to what you're doing daily to move toward your goal. (for instance, the above suggestion of meal planning or just snack planning so you have healthier alternatives ready to go, or commit to drinking more water and less other stuff). what ever you decide to change in your day make it a small manageable goal. And remember to always be grateful for what you do have thats great in your life and don't dwell on the other stuff too much. (i.e going to Key West for Christmas break sounds like a wonderful thing to me!) So if you lose weight before you go, GREAT! If you don't, its still GREAT! Take your fabulous self on down the the Keys and have a blast anyway!!!  

Analisa, I just read your comment and my heart goes out to you. I have a couple of questions for you ..... (1) Does you husband love you? and (2) Do you love yourself, as much? When couples are trying to get pregnant it's when they relax that the miracle occurs. Now you aren't trying to get pregnant but if you look at the weight journey a little less tough on yourself, maybe, just maybe the happiness will help and you will begin to lose weight. My cortisol (the stress hormone is through the roof preventing me ... hindering me from losing weight). Lean on your husband's love ... be kinder to yourself, smile everyday and you may not feel like sabotaging yourself. Get outside and get some Vitamin D (essential for weight loss).... drink lots of lemon water and dance your way everywhere ... including into your husband's arms for some good old exercise !!! Good luck girl, wish I had a husband taking me to Key West, or anywhere,or a husband who obviously doesn't care if you have a few extra pounds. You're lucky, count your blessings and don't be so hard on yourself kiddo. you are beautiful. 

Thank you all for helping me through this. You had made me cry (good tears). I know slow and steady wins the race, but I get so frustrated sometimes. I do have a lot to be thankful for. I guess I just want to be successful, and feel like I'm failing. I try and say things to myself like "Skinny tastes better than..." It's like I have good vs. evil on my shoulders and I try and talk myself out of it, but cave. Then I feel like crap for caving. It's just a vicious cycle, and I have to break it. Thank you all for shedding some light on things. Sometimes it's hard to accept things. I need to find that inner peace. I need to be okay with the fact that I won't be "skinny" in 5 weeks. One day at a time. Thanks again for inspiring me! xo  

Hi Analisa, Are you doing induction? I have looked at some of ur meals past few days and I don't see ur eating enough veggies.Do you drink ur water? You need 15-20 veggies in carbs. I was 190 lbs 2 years ago. I did induction until I was 15 lbs away from my goal of 145.  

Hi Analisa, I saw your post on my cell phone, and my heart ached for you. I have been thru the valleys of depression (just very recently), feeling like a failure at everything that I do, and feeling that I have no real support (at times) in my "real life"-- my wife has changed her eating life style as well, but turns around and "makes fun" of how I am doing it== keeping track of my calorie intake (she says that she just response by making "jokes" cause she is jealous of my "success." <yeah we had an argument over it and I brought it up that it really hurt when she does that.> And What I am bout to say is to try to encourage you, not to make you feel worse than what you already feel- but I hope that it might help some! I want to encourage you in several areas- first and the most important thing is that your emotional state is just temporary. I know it is dark, trust me-- read my journals-- My valley was very very dark that I am just now pulling out of as many of my "buddies" here will testify to..The second thing is that do not make any major decisions, including giving up on your "diet!" during this time- You will regrate if you do..Depression can really interfere with making wise choices.. just stay the course! You are not a failure, that is your depression talking! Sometimes you just have to say it long enough and loud enough to really believe it. And I know first hand how difficult that is to believe. Yeah, I still feel like a failure at this, even though I have lost nearly a hundred pounds since April. I feel like I should be at a lower weight than this. Yeah I beat myself up pretty badly. Even though People say I look great, I still view myself as being fat (well really I am still fat)-- I see that 373.4 lb person staring back at me in the mirror, and not the 277 lb person. I would also suggest that you go to your doctor, if you can afford it and ask him to run blood work on you- and see where your Vit D level is. We are in the winter months and lack of sunshine will affect/effect your mood. Especially if your Vit. D level is really low... It might help, mine is really really low, and I am taking Vit D... Also remember that your body knows that we are approaching winter- and it will try to keep as much fat as possible- which makes it harder to lose the weight. Don't give up, keep going! It is a battle, I keep saying and truly believe that food addiction is one of the hardest addictions to break. I am not saying that stopping drinking and smoking is not hard, cause it is.. But drinking and smoking you do not need to survive... you need to eat! Discipline is hard to control... May I ask, what is your comfort food? Do you eat extra cause you feel that need to just to eat? May I suggest that you eat salads instead of snack foods? Yeah, I know it really sound boring.. but for me, that is the best answer. I am a person that stays up late at night, I work seconds- my wife works thirds-- and she had internet that she used for us to email each other (before we had our internet disconnected) anyway before I went on this new journey I felt that I needed to eat something while "talking to her".. so I ate 6 little debbie swiss rolls at one sitting.. (yes I still miss them.. but will not touch them)... so I forced myself to eat salad instead.. It was a more of the "need" of chewing, then anything else.. and well those salads did the job.. (btw it is my only cheat food that I have, that I do not record).. Be patient with yourself! I know it is hard.. but you need to. I am a Christian, and I am not trying to push my faith down your throat.. but my pastor made a comment that kind of stuck with me.. Do you know I Cor 13- Paul wrote on the subject matter of love.. and I have always thought of it as loving other people.. but my pastor made the comment stating that we should apply these principles to loving ourselves...(As my pastor stated based on What Jesus said "the greatest two commandments “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’- How can we love our neighbors if we do not love ourselves?) I " Love is patient, (am I patient with myself== no not really)love is kind (I am my own worse critic!). It does not envy (Yeah I envy a lot- jealous), it does not boast (I try not too.. but I know I do, trying to cover up my lack of confidence in myself), it is not proud.(Yeah I at times, even though I feel that I can do better-- I am pretty proud of where I am on my weight) 5 It does not dishonor others (I am really bad bout this concerning myself), it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails"-- well I can go on with every statement.. but I will not... Be kind to yourself.. Lastly, if you do not have support in your real world.. you did the right thing by coming here... TRUST ME! The group of people here are great...and very supportive. I owe my "success" largely to this site and it's members! Again my dear friend..I am not trying to come across as beating you up... I am just trying to give you some advice from a person that battles a lot of what you are battling with... Take care.. let us know how you are doing...  

One last thing, before I leave the "pulpit"-- your diet can affect/effect your emotional being as well... make sure you eat the "right foods" do not go too low on your calorie intake, drink plenty of water, and excerise... now as an old cartoon character once said.. "exit stage left!!!"