madaboutmoose's Journal, 15 January 2011

Morning has broken!! Remember the old Cat Stevens song ... long before he changed his name.

January 15, 2011 ... three days from my anniversary ... 15 lbs from my original goal of 180. What do I think about that? I think I am blessed. I am blessed to still be here, consciously aware of my body, what I consume, how much I move my body, and still caring enough about myself not to give into that dark place.

For almost 2 years now I have remained conscious. In the past I would "diet" and lose weight ... reach a "goal" that was typically tied to some "event" and then stop paying attention ... sometimes for months ... sometimes for years!!! Up and down and up and down and up and down ... significant pounds gained and lost over my life time. I am sure it is a familiar story to many of you.

What has been different about these past few months ... when I have indeed gained weight?
1. I have continued to weigh, perhaps not everyday but I have continued to get on the scale and pay attention to the numbers.
2. I have remained mindful ... clearly aware of the choices I've made.
3. I still have moments I feel "positive" about myself.
4. I KNOW that I am NOT destined to be FAT.
5. I KNOW I will get back to my comfortable range.
6. I have a community of support I have never had before that extends beyond my living room.

And so on we go!!! I have been thinking a lot about buddies who come and go here on fatsecret. I miss some of the folks who have left us. I wonder how they are doing. I think about buddies who have been here for years, chattycathy, cindyshine, k8yk, and many many more ... indeed we are more than a number ... this is more than a "diet" ... this is more than a weight loss site.

Today I am grateful ...

1. for a three day weekend with the hope of getting some "to do" at home things DONE!!!

2. time to drink coffee and check in on fatsecret

3. the fun of beginning to think about a vacation to some place warm and tropical!!

4. for awareness

5. for hunger ... and working to feed my body in a healthy way!!!

Speaking of hunger ... I think it may be time to fix myself some breakfast!!! Before I get "too hungry" ... really not a good thing when I allow myself to get "too hungry" ... I become like a roaring lion looking for prey!!! Truly ... it is not a pretty sight. The challenge ahead of me, these next three days ... is to make wise choices while not distracted by my work in the office. To keep this momentum going ... to practice kindness towards myself, in thought, in action ...

Have a great weekend, a good day ... be good to yourselves.

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1245 kcal

Fat: 30.33g | Prot: 78.72g | Carb: 157.51g.   Breakfast: La Tortilla Factory Tortilla, large egg, Weight Watchers Mexican Cheese, water. Lunch: lettuce, Newman's Own Lighten Up Balsamic Vinagrette Dressing, tomato, Mexican Blend Cheese, feta cheese, chicken breast. Dinner: Lean Cuisine Sesame Stir Fry with Chicken. Snacks/Other: Genuine Draft 64, braided pretzels, banana, blue bunny light yogurt, Special K Bar Chocolatey Drizzle. more...

2698 kcal

Activities & Exercise: Precor Elliptical - 46 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 14 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...