|
I revel in the time it takes to just get a couple miles in, up and down these hills and exploring the sounds and sights of early morning. I have often lately not gotten in from work until 1am.
I have this notion that if I can just force myself up after a few hours I can do it. However, often times, I roll over and bathe in the heavenly bed below me, ignoring the wake up call, I cling to the last of a dream. Last October I had a dream of having a flat stomach! I believe that dream has driven me to this journey. To finding my friends here, and with belly not quite where I want it, accomplishing that goal.
I love morning. I love everything about it. It's been cold here, so I light a fire when I get up and huddle around it with a steaming cup of black coffee and a huge blanket around my now growing small body. My gown is now draped as it should be. Even the shoes I normally wear are getting big.
I have finally hit a place in this journey where clothing is not a problem. Where the pants I wore which were splitting are now mended and lay comfortably on me.
I am not done. I know there are many of us who think to do what we are about to attempt may be with pitfalls. But I am truly saying that it was actually easy...so far. I am out of shape but have had no trouble losing weight. I just did what I felt was right and the idea of feeding my body nutrients drove me to a place that is possible.
When I first began I imagined how people who are without food, suffer. I acknowledged in my heart how privileged I am to eat cashews and fresh vegetables, fruit and organic proteins. And in my heart, I felt that by getting healthy, I could insure that I'd be able to help people in some major way.
I pray a lot. I suppose in the end, if I could say the one true thing that remained constant has been my ability to talk to God and surround each little meal with gratefulness and thinking about how dearly I value staying alive and healthy; even more, how will I pay it forward?
I am stronger now than I was in years past. I love being in life and loving people. The buddies I've gained here on FS are AMAZING. You have helped transform me. I thank God everyday for all of you and those to come.
Love to you all,
Deb
|