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So today, I wasn't in the mood to cook or eat at all. I HAD to do my nails (acrylics) because they were grown out/off. So, an unplanned 24+ hour fast. Wasn't hungry at breakfast, busy at lunch, snacky for dinner.
Got an invite for another lunch with the ex. Here's my reply:
"Sounds great! I'll see you at 12 on Wednesday.
I'm just wondering where you want to go with this friendship. You cut it off with me because I was in love with you, and it made you uncomfortable.
I told you I would always love you. And that's still true. But being IN love, and loving forever are different things...
Then you jumped into a 'committed relationship' with another woman . WTF??
Are you filling empty time with me?
Or did you realize that you might have chosen the wrong one to have a committed relationship with?
You did hurt me by shutting things down so abruptly. It took me several months to stop thinking about you every day. To stop thinking about a possible future together.
I'm not willing to make room for you in my life again, unless there's a chance that it's going to be long-term."
It's up to you..
And his reply:
"Your questions are all good ones and I have to say I have asked myself all of them, some times over and over. This does not mean I have all the answers for me or you but I would like to talk with you about what I have figured out and what I still need to whenever you would like, even at lunch on Wednesday if you want or whenever. Not by email as has been very typical for me in the past but real talking."
So, my friends, we'll see what Wednesday brings,
Diet Calendar Entry for 26 September 2016:
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482 kcal
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Fat: 41.98g | Prot: 17.15g | Carb: 18.19g.
Breakfast: Coffee (Brewed From Grounds), Pyure Stevia Sweetener, Half and Half Cream. Snacks/Other: Planters Dry Roasted Peanuts, Wonderful Roasted & Salted Pistachios in Shells. more...
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 Comments
Oh, my. Stick to your guns. No compromises. You know what you need.
26 Sep 16 by member: bdmgoggins
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Never hurts to throw down the gauntlet every once in a while Kes, keeping things open and honest from the "git-go" cuts down on those awkward moments when you think you showed too much of your feelings to someone.
26 Sep 16 by member: debrafrederick
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But , because you (loved) him first time around.......he wasn't in love with you at that time......maybe it was too soon for him . His wife had just died , right?maybe he was looking for a great friendship not love... Or am I wrong....... Tell me if I am. I had been married I am out of touch with this flirting thing........ Why do you want someone to commit to long term so soon? Have fun girl.you might change your mind about him..... Might not want to spend the next 30 or 40 years with him......get to know him first... I might be wrong. Won't be the first time..........
26 Sep 16 by member: Char60
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Well, you spelled it out, now you'll just have to see.
26 Sep 16 by member: PhillySue
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Hope this all works out the way you want it to.
26 Sep 16 by member: rhontique
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Hmmmmm....you are wise and aware so I have no doubt you will know what to do next.
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Well that is his card marked. Now he knows exactly what your feelings are, he just needs to decide where he stands. Hope things work out well.
27 Sep 16 by member: JockoT
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Good for you. Keep strong
27 Sep 16 by member: Mrs Maths
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My spidey sense says to shut it down. Find some last minute reason you can't make luñch and see what shakes out. See if he picks up the phone and scrambles to make another date. Then, date.
27 Sep 16 by member: LadyinDenim
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I love that you are able to "put it out there". No game playing! You handle yourself awesomely, are able to articulate how you feel. Just listen to your gut....
27 Sep 16 by member: Rckc
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I think Lady is right, the guy sounds shady; ran from you right to another woman? You ever listen to Limp Bizkit?
27 Sep 16 by member: @philrmcknight
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I think he is just realizing his feelings for you run deeper than he thought before. Just my opinion! Have a good talk Kes!
27 Sep 16 by member: CC170
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^^Lady and Phil. Not sure if this is going to end the way you would like, but who knows. All the best.
27 Sep 16 by member: CCbabcock
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Hey, he admitted to thinking about what he was doing - that is a start, and then he wants to talk in person so he is going to put out what he thinks and take your reaction face-to-face like a man, so who knows? Good luck!
27 Sep 16 by member: abbadabba
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good for you for speakingyour mind!! the ball is in his court now
27 Sep 16 by member: kathleenscanlan
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Thanks guys! Again, I love all the different perspectives you bring. I have a certain equanimity about the whole thing. Either way, I will be me. I'm not big on playing games, or playing coy. If he's realized that he made the wrong choice, and wants to pursue me, I will give him a chance. If he really wants to be just friends, I'm open to that. With limits. He is a really nice man...have I mentioned that? I'm convinced he's not a user, just searching for a direction for the next part of his life. Maybe taking some chances he didn't take when he was younger. @Phil, Limp Bizkit is not really my style of music, so no...LOL. He may be shady, but I really don't think so. I do think he has very little experience with being alone, and that may be a part of it. We never had any agreement of exclusivity , so he may have been seeing the other lady at the same time. Not a biggie, but it would have been nice to have 'full disclosure'.
We'll see tomorrow. :)
27 Sep 16 by member: mskestrela
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Interesting... I agree the ball is in his court, but just make sure you are your own coach and cheerleader. Good Luck!! Hope it goes REALLY well.
27 Sep 16 by member: HawksFan87
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