Miraculum's Journal, 19 August 2017

Okay, I'm back from from the edge of oblivion, the black hole of unrestrained eating. I posted my weight accurately each day. At first, I also recorded all the food I ate for my own benefit, to see exactly how much damage I was doing. It was humiliating enough to admit it to myself, so I deleted all of it.

Soaring blood sugar caused mid-day drowsiness (the first time I've experienced it since beginning my journey on 07/01/2017) and I gained back a grand total of 5.5 pounds from my lowest weight to date.

To complicate things, the combination of minor inherited deformitites, advanced arthritis, and Charcot foot due to peripheral neuropathy are causing increased bony deformities -- hard, bony prominences -- and constant pain in my right foot. My anti-inflammatory medication isn't touching this. (I don't have circulatory problems, thank God.)

I'm back into my big padded boot. I've requested a referral back to the orthopedic specialist who performed surgery on my left foot some years ago.

I drew the line at midnight last night. It's easy to lose everything *but* the weight. Having experienced the benefits of eating to live, living to eat feels like volunteering for torture.
217.5 lb Lost so far: 67.5 lb.    Still to go: 49.5 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

Diet Calendar Entries for 19 August 2017:
1197 kcal Fat: 54.86g | Prot: 86.59g | Carb: 90.39g.   Lunch: Boar's Head Maple Glazed Honey Coat Turkey Breast, Plum, Strawberries, Sweet Red Peppers. Dinner: Calavo Avocado, Reese Hearts of Palm, Cherry Tomatoes, Perdue Grilled Chicken Breast Strips, Ken's Steak House Balsamic Vinaigrette Dressing. Snacks/Other: Choc Zero Chocolate, Peaches, Strawberries, Harris Teeter Organics Whole Organic Red Raspberries (Frozen), General Foods Suisse Mocha (Sugar and Caffeine Free), Coffee-Mate Original Powder Creamer. more...
2424 kcal Activities & Exercise: Sleeping - 6 hours, Resting - 18 hours. more...
on diet LCHF: Low carb, High fat / Ketogenic Diet   gaining 3.5 lb a week

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Comments 
1. Get rid of that maple glazed honey 🍯...switch to cracked pepper turkey breast eliminating that sugar. What happened to breakfast? You know you have to record all this so you can analyze it. What do you think is upsetting you besides me right now? Have to get your protein back up. Nutritional information says to watch are much artificial sweetener you're using because that can stimulate your cravings further. I totally get going berserk with the sweets 🍭. I stopped eating my chocolate croissant at night because it was just to indulgent. I kept going over on my fats and knew it was the croissant. I rationalized that I'd saved the 280 calories for the end of the day to have 4 oz. 1% milk + croissant. But was skipping other nutrition to do it. Now, I eat 3 of those mini frozen eclairs. It does the trick and I get my fix. Please let me know if there's anything I can do to help other than continue to verbally annoy you as I've been doing? Carry on. 
19 Aug 17 by member: paulanavarette
I do the same thing that you are talking about. There are days that I just allow myself the unrestrained eating and I feel bad about it later. I've had days where there was no meal at all, just potato chips or pie for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Just eating the junk I bought until it is gone. I've gained and lost the same 25 pounds 3 or 4 times in the past 5 years. I'm finding the support here on FS amazing! To know there are people who don't even know me are hoping I succeed. Right now I really have nothing bad to eat in the house. It's easier to do that when you live alone. But it's also easier to really go crazy when there is bad stuff knowing that I am the only one who is going to eat that pie I bought at Costco on a bad impulse or the "family" size bag of chips I bought because it cost the same as the smaller bag. I know you will succeed because you are trying so hard and are being so honest about the challenges you are facing. 
19 Aug 17 by member: Fritzy 22
Oh, how I wish all the "annoying" people in my life were as helpful and caring as my FS buddies! Thanks to both Paula and Fritzy for your support! Yes, Fritzy, just eating junk all day long, when I'm by myself. Whole pies and tubes of Pringles, candy bars, Starbucks Frappuccino... things I haven't eaten in over six weeks. (I made a really healthy dinner last night to share with my husband, of course!)  
19 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
Paula, my use of black pepper was almost non-existent until my husband taught me to appreciate it ... a little, anyway. OTOH, "Boars Head Maple Glazed Honey Coat Turkey Breast" (TM) is a "cheap cheat" that I've built into my plan. I love it, and the bit of sweetness is comforting. No, whole dutch apple pies are what I need to avoid! I've also purchased "pea protein" from Vitacost to help boost my protein consumption. (I found this stuff to replace whey protein.)  
19 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
The only artificial sweetener I use is stevia, a total of a teaspoon a day in my morning coffee. Amazingly, the Kraft Cool Whip Lite and the less expensive Harris Teeter brand Lite Whipped Topping that I sometimes add to a bowl of fruit contain no artificial sweeteners ... just "corn syrup" and "high fructose corn syrup"!! My rationale: It makes my fruit dessert a little more "dessert-y." From now on, I'm limiting that to 2 tablespoons (20 calories) a day, if any at all. 
19 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
What's bothering me lately, that I went off the rails: I keep going back to that concept of "loading" (advocated once every NINE WEEKS by the Global Weight Loss Program I'm doing right now) or "refeeding" (the keto rationale) to "reset" the metabolism. The GWLP is very much like a keto plan, although it doesn't say that in the materials. (The plan limits carbohydrate to low-carb fruits and veggies, like keto, but limits fats, limits calories to 1200-1500/day, and advises "cheating" with protein only. Like everything, "It works if you work it!") So, I get to thinking, "Why not *binge* and call it 'loading,' or 'refeeding'? That's the set-up. I do recognize the thought patterns and "feel it coming on" like the demon it is! I have to avoid this thought pattern entirely. I'm doing that now by reminding myself of how successful this program has been: I didn't feel hungry; I didn't have those cravings that used to haunt me from the moment I woke up to the moment I fell asleep at night; my need for all my medications was dropping along with my weight. Back to work! 
19 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
No breakfast: The GWLP I'm doing doesn't allow breakfast until "maintenance," on the theory that this limited "fast" takes advantage of higher morning metabolism. Again, something I think it borrows from "keto." However, it does fit our daily "rhythm," and I don't miss it. My husband used to work second shift and never ate his first meal of the day before noon or so. I don't get up until 9:30 or 10:00 a.m. and have coffee with my crossword puzzle, Jumble, Dear Abby, and newspaper funnies. "Lunch" on the GWLP is scheduled between 11:00 a.m. and 1:00 p.m. It works for us. 
19 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
I didn't realize until signing up on FS that I do intermittent fasting when I am trying to lose weight. I usually don't eat after 2 or 3pm. So I am hungry in the morning when I wake up. I rarely skip breakfast unless I have an early doctor appointment or am in a hurry to take my dog to the dog park. I usually have breakfast around 6-6:30am, lunch between 10am and 11am and IF I have a dinner it's usually small and around 2pm. If I feel I need something, I'll make a cup of hot tea or have a diet soda . Like now, it's almost 5:30pm and I'll probably get something to drink. If I have any energy, it's usually early in the day and by 3pm or so, I'm done with anything active. The opposite of most people I know. 
19 Aug 17 by member: Fritzy 22
Miraculum: Everyone is different but one of the things that helped me was taking Dr. Bernstein's advice about eating the same amount of protein at each meal and the least carbs at breakfast. Apparently, your body gets "accustomed" to your eating habits and begins to create just the right amount of insulin. I eat 1500 calories a day, moderate fat around 100 grams and same amount of protein every day. I strive for 30 net carbs but usually hit like 40 -60. Best to you! 
19 Aug 17 by member: perks54
Thanks for the info, Perks54. 
19 Aug 17 by member: Miraculum
Perks54, I have a hard time getting enough protein in my diet, whether I'm trying to lose weight or not. I had heard that it was good to try to get around 30 grams of protein for breakfast, which I find nearly impossible. My doctor is advising me on my weight loss process told me specifically not to have any processed meats and just to be sure I understood he said "no bacon, no sausage, no salami, pepperoni, etc". He also wants me to eliminate as much as possible processed foods. I asked him about protein powder and he said that is processed food. I have a large amount of protein powder I bought at Costco prior to my discussion with him. I may use it to use it up. My next doctor appointment is in September and I'll ask him which is worse for me-processed meat or protein powder. I think he'll tell me to have the protein powder if I have to. But he also thinks about 40 grams of protein a day is sufficient for me. 
20 Aug 17 by member: Fritzy 22
You must try turkey bacon. Turns out well on paper towels in the microwave. And please try scrambled egg with fresh wilted spinach and a tablespoon of grated mozzarella cheese. It is delicious, full of protein, low in carbs and satisfying. Maybe some sliced tomato on the side. I avoid bread, even whole grain wheat, down to 1 slice a day, if that. I keep home made vegetable soup, without potatoes, corn or peas, in the fridge to get a bite when I feel I want "something" or slice a bunch of iceberg lettuce with a tomato, without dressing. I love the crunch and refreshing feeling. A slug of V8 helps every day too. I am type 2 diabetic and live now by what a meal does to my blood sugar. I have had to eliminate a lots of foods, or if it is just an ingredient in a recipe, I have to rework the recipe to stop the spiking. It has worked well. I had no intention of just "dieting" when I started this, but to take the tail of the tiger of my blood sugar getting out of control. I already had bad kidneys and I knew trouble was just around the corner if I didn't stop. I have 2 degenerating discs in my back, vascular ploblems in my left leg and foot, and have a fake one on my right, so I am very lack of exercise. I cant do much but for about 15 min at a time before my back screams, no more. But I was amazed that within a month I had lost over 15 pounds just going low, low carb. I started at 177 and I am now at 152. It has just melted off. I feel healthy as well as I can. My disabilities are physical and I cant change that, but I try to do something every day. I actually count nothing. Not calories, not carbs, just the blood sugar numbers. 
20 Aug 17 by member: jeancason
jeancason: Rock and roll on your idea of eat what your body can handle. Letthe blood sugar meter be your guide. And, every person is different so you can't "read" what others say is good to eat. Both Dr. Bernstein and jenny Ruhl (diabetes authors) both recommend that way of eating  
20 Aug 17 by member: perks54
@Miraculum, Leanne on healthfulpursuit dot com has a (disappointingly?) pragmatic outline of "carb up" meals. Maybe worth looking at? @Fritzy, is bone broth an option? The kind I drink has 10g protein per 8oz. 
20 Aug 17 by member: T8U9

     
 

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