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I make myself crazy sometimes!!! Perhaps I need a brain transplant ... LOL!!! We went out last night. So, of course I ate differently yesterday evening. I chose a shrimp dish at the mexican restaurant we went too ... it was good but had a bunch of cheese on it. Cheese and I have had a long love affair but since January I really haven't eaten much of it. Initially I stressed out ... oh my goodness Bob ... look at all that cheese!!! He smiled and said to me ENJOY!!! So then I relaxed and ate. The cheese was too much ... LOL!!! I picked some it off to the side, Bob ate some, funny how things taste different after a while. It was still delicious though. And of course I HAD to have a cocktail ... which I enjoyed. Then a light beer later I shared with Bob. And then dessert at Denny's ... which I also enjoyed but couldn't not finish.
So ... what am I thinking this morning? Well ... maybe I won't weigh this morning ... I'll just be real good and weigh tomorrow or Monday!! DOLT!!!!! NEGATIVE!!!! WHY???????????
When will I get it through my thick skull that it doesn't really matter if the scale goes up or down on any particular day .... that it is okay to enjoy myself .... ??????????????????????
And this is after my very recent vacation up 11 pounds down 11 pounds in one week experience!! Too funny and kind of sad!! So I did get on the scale. No change. Maybe it will change tomorrow maybe it will not. It does not matter. What matters is what I eat today. What matters is I am good to myself. What matters is I make peace with myself and food.
The other funny thing is my dear husband is negotiating with me about how much more I "can" lose. He has a co-worker who has lost 100 pounds in the last 6 months who doesn't look well. I guess he's hunched over, too thin, and now looks like a little old man. Bob is worried about me losing too much!!! My goal has been 175 ... he thinks 180 is better. I told him what I've wrote here ... my body will tell me when it is happy with my weight if I treat it right and I intend to treat it right. One morning I feel great the next I feel fat ... but I think lots of "normal weight" people experience that as well.
My other experience was trying on clothes to pick what to wear out last night. I tried on several pair of nicer pants ... almost all of them were too big for me!!! That's a good news/bad news scenario!!! I liked some of those slacks a lot!! They were all size 16 ... I can wear some 16's still but I guess it is mostly size 14 now. I even have a couple of size 12's. I have NEVER worn mostly size 14 in my life. At least not since I've been an adult. How is it that our body's shrink and we still think we are "fat" ... nteresting.
Well I've droned on much too long. Time to eat ... my son is coming up today and spending the night so I'm looking forward to seeing him. A little BBQ tonight ... maybe scrabble and beer!!! LOL!!! Have a great day!!! Take care of yourselves and let's work together on acceptance and patience.
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188.4 lb
Lost so far: 70.8 lb.
Still to go: 3.4 lb.
Diet followed 100%.
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Diet Calendar Entries for 30 May 2009:
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1226 kcal
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Fat: 29.66g | Prot: 89.29g | Carb: 169.15g.
Breakfast: medifast cocoa, water. Lunch: Yoplait Light Thick & Creamy Key Lime, Orowheat Light, deli roast beef. Dinner: Hidden Valley Ranch Fat Free, Hidden Valley Ranch Light, Baked Beans - Original, iceberg lettuce, boneless skinless chicken breast, perrier. Snacks/Other: Marathon Nutrition Bar - Dark Chocolate Crunch, Jello Sugar Free Cinnamon Rice Pudding, apple, cantaloupe, Kashi GoLean Cinnamon Coffee Cake. more...
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2983 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Elliptical - 1 hour and 18 minutes, Resting - 14 hours and 42 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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steady weight
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