Ms Elizabeth's Journal, 02 August 2023

Ever wake up grumpy? Alarm clock goes off and you open your eyes and you think.. today I choose violence? I woke up like that today. Not necessarily the violence part but definitely a I will choose to death stare anyone who approaches me today attitude.

This was brought on by 3 things. One.. yesterday was stressful and I overate. I was surprised I didn't step on the scale and discover I hadn't gained 10 lbs. I grazed ALL day long. Work was next level. I worked 12 hours to make up for a server crashing on Monday. At 4:55 pm someone on my team called me for a nothing issue just because he didn't like the answer the others on the team had given him. He's difficult on a good day. Let alone a next level day. I declined the call.

Two.. I got 5 hours of sleep maybe? Before I went to bed I received a meeting invite from the guy on an already back to back meeting day. He did this over lunch when I normally go to the gym. I answered the invite with so and so is right. Listen to them and declined. He's someone who doesn't like being told no, he mansplains, talks down to people, tries to push things when he doesn't like them, etc. He thinks these are great qualities. I like the ideas and the feedback but sometimes you have to just let it go.

Three.. I had a dream with the ex's girlfriend in it. She's crazy cakes. She claims she's a nurse BUT SHES NOT. She was a glorified receptionist when she had a job. Seriously. CRAZY CAKES. She hears voices. I feel sorry for her but she's not my monkey. She's only my issue because she's exposed to my 2 boys. She had my 8 yr old convinced people were breaking into the house and touching her stuff, cutting her hair, hiding and talking about her. No one broke in and none of this really happened. I had a dream I had to go to a giant slide/amusement place with her and she kept giving the boys medical advice. Like if you get hurt on the slide that's bad but if a limb goes numb that's ok. I avoid this woman like the plague. The last thing I want to do is dream about her.

I'm still grumpy. I went to the gym. My eating isn't horrible today. I got a hug from the boyfriend at the gym. I should not be grumpy. I'm going to go home now and watch smutty tv. I'm not sure what smutty tv there is but I'm going to find some.