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11 April 2019

11 April 2019

10 April 2019

I like updates. As you saw earlier, Day 1 of intermittent fasting. It’s 10 am and I am hungry. Breakfast had been my time to eat big or go home. I always thought that I was supposed to eat it, and come to find out that it’s the best meal to skip. So I’m skipping it.

I’m hungry, really hungry. I drank 8 ounces of green tea with 1 tablespoon of lemon juice. Both all natural and organic. I should have drank water before now but I was feeling kind of low and Not energetic this morning. Somehow I feel more energetic having not eaten breakfast. I’ll have the kitchen clean before I even get to my first meal. That to me is huge.

Dinner will be breaded Parmesan porkchops, my wife has organic carrots that she wants to try cooking her way, and corn bread. This will keep my carbs for the day around the 100 mark, which I’ve been doing consistently now for 4 days. My body is adjusting to this level pretty well. I feel good, I’m not hungry when eating, and I have more energy.

My back pain is virtually gone now. It comes back from time to time, when doing long periods of being up on my feet, but it has mostly disappeared. This to me was my FIRST MILESTONE!!! I’m so happy about this, words can’t describe it.

Second milestone, I’m meditating daily. I still get angry, and sad. I still have my negative emotions and I still have limited patience. This all of course pertains to my severe depression. But I’m getting better. I’m catching myself before being snappy, I’m showing more love, I’m starting to gain empathy (not much, but baby steps), and I feel like my sociopathic mind is sort of fading away.

Self acceptance and observation has done me wonders.

I still haven’t met my calorie goal. I posted the picture of my count yesterday, but that changed. I’m sad to say that I ended up eating a chocolate chip cookie. It was way too sweat for me. I haven’t had actual sugar in days. I really struggled to eat it, but I used it as a lesson to myself. I don’t need to eat sweets. Sugar doesn’t taste good and I know it.

Slowly but surely I’m getting to where I want to be. I know some people will think I should just dive head first into the diet and fight past things. I’m sorry, but I can’t. If I just allow myself to refuse carbs now, I’ll be feeding into my depression by going to extreme, which I always do. So understand that this easing into it is more about being healthy mentally rather than physically. Both are important, and I believe more so on the mental aspect.

Anyway, that’s my update today. If you read this far, thank you so much for showing me your support. Everyone here has made me feel so welcome and I’m proud to be on FatSecret.

10 April 2019

10 April 2019

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