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Weight History
showing entries 1 to 5 of 48
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18 January 2017
Not good. I think there's something going on with the sodium. Gathering up, pretty much!
Weigh-in:
160.5 lb
lost so far:
0.4 lb
still to go:
21.6 lb
Diet followed reasonably well
add comment
gaining 4.6 lb a week
17 January 2017
Well, here we go again. I am one month in my break up and luckily im not sorrowing in sulk. Just trying to get things done. Trying to take care of myself... I haven't made contact and to be honest i don't want to either. The diet isn't really working but to be honest again saying that i broke up so i m not following my plan feels like an excuse. I AM going to the gym though, almost every day, pumping some iron and playing squash. I have found that lifting really helps with blowing some steam that's gathered up. And hell, I wanna follow my diet more closely BADLY. I'm starting to see some difference in my body regarding the build -i ve always been muscular though-but i wanna drop THOSE BLOODY POUNDS THERE.
And for sure if he or his new love interest sees me again, I want to be super awesome. And thin!! (slim is fine too)
I m sure going to need your help on that.
But mostly, i m starting to feel -slowly- that i m focusing on myself!!!
Weigh-in:
159.8 lb
lost so far:
1.1 lb
still to go:
20.9 lb
Diet followed reasonably well
(6 comments)
gaining 0.4 lb a week
23 December 2016
Weigh-in:
158.3 lb
lost so far:
2.6 lb
still to go:
19.4 lb
Diet followed reasonably well
add comment
gaining 8.5 lb a week
21 December 2016
Weigh-in:
155.9 lb
lost so far:
5.1 lb
still to go:
17.0 lb
Diet followed reasonably well
(2 comments)
losing 3.9 lb a week
19 December 2016
Thank you sooo much for the support everyone... I haven't texted or called or anything yet (just a few desperate tweets stating my loneliness to no one in particular). I have kept my distance, i haven't gone to his house, i haven't begged, i haven't tried reaching him. Yes, the pain has started to sink in. But also, YES, I have realised that i wasn't the person that i wanted to be, i didn't have a regime of my own, my goals were stuck, i couldn't dream, i couldn't really feel or focus on anything! All of my focus was on him, all i wanted was to wait for him to do anything either that was the initiative to break up or move on with me. My life was mostly about him. And even though i did a great deal of things i didnt really put my heart or head in any of those. I feel numb and in pain but also - oh God- oh so clean. I feel i need to start caring about me again. REALLY DO SO. I don't even know if it's possible but i had missed myself SO MUCH. Right now i feel so confused.... Confused but clean. I love him sure.... but i NEED to love me too. I want to become my own person, i just felt like i was so.... empty. EMPTY AF. There is such a huge void inside of me.... obviously because he left and took my everything with him. But truthfully, i has hanging there empty... i was oh so empty before he left.... and eventhough i was indeed trying to get myself full again... i just couldnt. Not wilst he was there, not wilst i was waiting for him to silently judge me or treat me badly me or psychologically abuse me. Because what is telling someone i love you and i need you and i need you to do this and that and him saying that he cant and then telling you off because you re unhappy.... and shutting the phone to your face and never ever being there when you need them? i was asking for love and got pain. And some more pain on top of that... and the answer to me wondering when he s going to give what i want? "why are you nagging, i am here aren't i? you are so unappreciative of me and my trying to be there for you and love you"..... whilst i was begging for love... and him giving me null..
... feel free to be supportive...
(4 comments)
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