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01 June 2011

Okay, day one under my belt. I can see from my diet log that most of my calories comes from fat. Hmmm, didn't seem like it, but numbers don't lie. To think these numbers are coming from me trying to "behave" What on earth would have they looked like when I wasn't trying. <shudder> It's nice to have to take some accountability, even if it's only to myself and other anonymus folks on this site. It's awesome to see the numbers staring you in the face. No excuses, no pretending. It's right there on the chart. Cool.

No "work - out" today. Spent the afternoon while my daughter napped mowing lawn. That's a lot of steps, pushing and pulling, as our ride on mower is on the fritz and repair is unlikely. (it's REALLY old.) And our yard is big. REALLY BIG. That was about 2.5 hours. Not a fast pace but a lot of work. As long as my output is higher than my input I'll be happy....for now.

GOAL: Want to wake early and see if I can gather myself to go out for a jog down the coulee to the creek and back before the little ones wake and my husband has to go out to work. There has been a cougar sighted not all that far from here, so I'm hesitant to go out. Mind games, he's not going to be in our coulee, not enough trees....RIGHT?!!?!

"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
Some come from ahead and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see.
Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!"
~ Dr. Seuss

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01 June 2011

I know I need to loose weight. I don't feel fat, but my pants are increasing in size and gradually I think my knees are getting sore. I have had 4 kids in 5 years and though I kept my weight off for the first 2, my last 2 babies were another story altogether. I'm also a proud person. I want to do it when I want and how I want. On my terms.

I did need a little wake up moment to get started, but when my husband mentioned that maybe I should be doing something about my "overweight issue" I wanted to club him. There's a way to tell someone that they're overweight (like they don't already know - duh!)and concerned for health reasons, and a way not to. I know he's not the best with words but his was was the way not to. I'm the type that if you ask me to do something, I'll do it. Tell me to do something and I'll fight you even if it's not in my best interest to do so. Like I said - my terms. When I said I needed a wake up moment, that isn't exactly what I had in mind. In the end I guess motivation is motivation, be it negative or positive.

Now I have to fight the voice in my head that tells me I'm working out because he told me to and replace it with the voice of reason - that working out is for me. That I wanted to do it anyway. Ugh. Ya, maybe negative motivation isn't so great.

On the positive, it will be a wonderful thing to look as great as I feel, and no one can dictate how I feel. I look forward to some me time, and purchasing the treadmill I've always wanted. I'm excited to become a stronger person, both inside and out. To be an even better role model for my children because they'll grow up with a Mum who displays fitness and health as a way of life. Not just making sure they do it.

On an honest note, my husband really isn't a jerk. He may have said the words wrong, but I know he's really looking out for my best interest. It just stings so bad because he hit the nail on the head, and really was just reiterating something I already knew. I've been talking about working out for a long time. When I turned 30 in March, I told myself and him this was it. Time to be in control - then I guess I found many reasons or perhaps excuses not to. I'm also a pretty sensitive person - I still feel how I've explained previously, but I know his intentions were true.

Let this journey begin!!

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01 June 2011

Weigh-in: 185.0 lb

lost so far: 0 lb

still to go: 40.0 lb

Diet followed N/A

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