Divided By Zero's Journal

I'm here. Kinda... sorta... not really.

I've been AWOL for a bit, and probably will be for a bit more. Sorry.

I have a tradition of going apes*** with food after a big race, so I've eaten my weight in pizza over the last few weeks. I've gained... a lot. In part from post-race festivities, and in part from a lot of stress induced buffet free-for-alls.

Lots of things on my mind right now. Once I sort everything out I'll be back on track.

Hopefully that's sooner than later.


Until then...
randomness1)
What do you call a cross between and elephant and a rhino?
Hellifiknow.

DUN DUN DUNNNNNN!!!

And so it begins...
... or something.

Weekend wrap up:
Friday: I went to my girlfriend's house and played SceneIt with her & her brother. I won. BOOYAH!
Saturday: HALLOWEEN!!! BESTEST HOLIDAY EVER!!!
Sunday: I ran the DRC Half Marathon... then cried like a little girlie man. I finished my first half marathon in 2:24:25. I finished this one in 2:03:10. I improved my time by more than 20 freakin' minutes. w0000000t! My average pace was 9:24 minutes per mile. Then I went to go see Law Abiding Citizen.
Monday: I took the day off work and went ice skating with my girlfriend. I only fell once. HOORAY! Then we went to this program she volunteers for that helps non-native English speakers with Americanizing their English. I think I'll keep coming to help.

RANDOM MEDIA:
Halloween pics of my spooky house that scared trick-or-treaters (and random office pics).

Race pics from my second half marathon (13.1 miles)...

I got beat by Sonic. Awesome.


Attempting to stretch (and not cry while doing so) after the race.

There's also a post race "interview" video that my girlfriend took right after I finished. I don't have the raw data so only those of you with access to my Facebook profile will be able to see that one. Here's the transcript:
"You have just completed your 2nd half marathon. How do you feel?"
"Like s***."
[...]
"You're all shaky and stuff. It's pretty funny."
"I feel like Santa Claus (if he) got beat and ran over by all his reindeers, and then Mrs. Claus kicked him out of the house,[...] and he's stinky and sweaty, and none of the kids like him anymore"
"Are you gonna make it?"
"Yeah. I'm gonna work really hard on not dying right now. [...] I'm going to cry like a little girl, but I'm gonna be OK."


randomness1)

Guess who?

I figured for Halloween I would interview the ghost in my house. Some of you are sensitive to spirits and will be able to read the interview. Some of you will not be able to see it at first, and may need a little guidance to reveal the conversation. Even if you can't read the interview, you can still laugh at my costume pics. Yes, I showed up to work dressed like this today. I know, I'm awesome. :P

Interview
Friday October 30, 2009. 3:15AM
[START RECORDING]
/0: This is Divided by Zero, I'm currently in my house using a tape recorder to capture EVP recordings of the ghost haunting my house. I'll start with a greeting to see if he's around. Hello? Is anybody there?

Disembodied voice: Of course I'm here, numbnuts, I'm ALWAYS here. I've been haunting this place since before you were born.

/0: I think I heard something. When I play back the tape I'll raise the volume so I can understand it. Okay, now that I think he's here it's time for a few questions. Why are you haunting my house?

Disembodied voice: Why did you move into a haunted house? You knew it was haunted, but noooooooo, you just had to move in anyway.

/0: Are you in distress?

Disembodied voice: Of course I'm "distressed". I'm dead. I don't know how much more distressed you can get than dead. The living ask a lot of dumb questions.

/0: Do you like it here?

Disembodied voice: This place is boooring. All you do is play video games and watch The Biggest Loser. Worst. Haunt. Ever. If I could leave this place I'd be in Hugh Hefner's mansion by now.

/0: Why do you try to scare me?

Disembodied voice: Duh, it's funny. You jump at your own shadow half the time. It's just too easy. All I have to do is make a sound and you're up half the night in freakout mode. It's better than cable tv, which you should also get and leave on for me during the day, while we're on the subject.


/0: Do you have any family?

Disembodied voice: What, like a ghost daddy and a ghost doggie that follow me around? What kind of question is that? NEXT.

/0: Can you do something to prove you're here.

Disembodied voice. I could, but then you'd freak out and keep me up the rest of the night with your silly questions. I'm just going to keep quiet and hope you go away.

/0: Hmmm. Nothing happened. Oh well, I guess he's not here. I'll just go to bed now.

Disembodied voice: Sucker.
[END RECORDING]


randomness1)
Here's my work costume... OFFICE NINJA. True story. One of my many nicknames at work is "office ninja" because I sneak up on people all the time to ask dumb questions or to just startle folks. I decided it would be an easy (AND CHEAP!) costume since I already had nearly everything I needed. I only had to buy a pair of black socks to cut up for arm sleeves. So I only spent about $3 out-of-pocket for this.

My paper shuriken will destroy you.


PAPER JAM MY ASS!!! HI-YAH!!!

Most runners will tell you they run races for charity, for the challenge, for the camaraderie, blah, blah, BLAH.

The REAL reason we do it.

RANDOM FREE STUFF!!!



This race's bounty:
Long sleeve technical shirt w/ race logo
Small reusable shopping bag to hold swag
Craploads of coupons/discounts for random things & race promos
1/2 off Dallas Stars tickets in November
Package of strawberry CLIF Shot Bloks
CLIF Quench Fruit Punch sports drink
EAS Myoplex protein shake

The Half-Mary (13.1 miles) is Sunday morning. WOOHOO! This will be my second half marathon. My first one was in August with a finishing time around 2 hours 24 minutes. I'm no speed demon, but I'm hoping to shave a few minutes off of that to set a new personal record.

I'M TESTING OUT HIDDEN TEXT HERE

Weekend wrap up...

I watched the Evil Dead trilogy for the first time. Groovy.
I prayed to the porcelain gods. I don't plan on doing this again.
I saw Zombieland. Awesomsauce.
I played DDR at an arcade. Also awesomesauce.
I ran 16 miles in the dark... without a light... in Dallas... without my glasses... in a thunderstorm.

Anyways, I have my 2nd half marathon this Sunday. HOORAY! The only part that sucks is that I can't stay up late on Halloween since I have to wake up super early for the race. Oh well.


randomness1)
The rules in Zombieland cracked me up. Especially rule #1.