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Thursday - Sunny! Yesterday was dreary with thunderstorms. I'm sure there was some small connection that my eating preferences were not as they have been the past couple of weeks. I had my veggie juice but discarded it for junk (pork rinds, cheese, cookies) and in the evening I ate some of the dish I'd prepared the night before (Baked Italian Sausage Farfalle with a small slice of garlic toast) but then proceeded to bake a cake and eat half of it. Granted it was one of those small cakes but still... geez. A grapefruit before bed and when I'd been awake from midnight to 4am I had half a raisin bagel with creme cheese because water and waiting wasn't clearing my hunger. Today however I'm back (so far) sipping a fresh veggie juice of beets, carrots, celery with some pineapple and an orange.
I'd make a joke about something happening in the washer/dryer because my pants are loose but I had to acknowledge other than the ability to walk and stand longer as well as take the stairs without running out of breath I'm able to reach around, stand up, and crawl out of bed easier than before. So somewhat reduced in size and increased in stamina. The home cooked fresh meals, the colonic, juice, being mindful of choices, it's working. If I could just get decent sleep I'd be even better. Which reminds me, I need to go order that NeuroSleep.
Okay - done. It may be magic beans but it works. It doesn't knock me out - I can still hear and waken but I'm not as anxious or stressed trying to fall asleep. And with my concern about the mental, physical and emotional safety of my Grandson my sleeplessness and anxiety are thru the roof. This is Blondie's kiddo and she's upset as well. We're both trying to be puppet masters behind the scene trying to break this unholy relationship apart.
I'm trying to find a balance with the juice vs meals. Having the juice for breakfast still leaves me hungry ... well, maybe it would not if I drank it all immediately. I tend to sip on it through the day; I've been sipping it for almost four hours now. But the ... geez, is she a nutritionist, colon specialist, holistic healer... what or how should I refer to her?? I think I'll call her Domino for Dominique but not give the misconception she's controlling me.
Anyway, Domino recommended NOT guzzling the veggie juice - give it time to set in my mouth to let the digestion begin there. So it takes a while. Meanwhile, despite that and water I feel hungry because it's nearly 2pm. Need to find a solution.
And wrapping up - Mr. Discreet came by yesterday to pick up his order. He still brought up taking me somewhere... but for some reason my sedate little shop turned into a 7-11 (one customer after another) and he didn't have time to sit alone with me and get his flirt on. Thank you Cosmic Angel. Uncomfortable situation averted for a while.
Oh... yeah... THAT... that could be why eating went off the rails... worrying about his appointment and how that'd go... oh, yeah.
It's interesting to get this old... so many neurosis, so little time.
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