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Everything has gone to S***T over here at my house. As you guys know I lost my job, which was initially suppose to be a GOOD thing. And it still is, I needed to the break to just stand back and breath.
I was GOING to spend more time on ME by exercising more and planning my meals better but was happened instead is that I have been spending more time doing homework (for school), staying up late doing homework, waking up and doing homework (who knew I was so behind on my homework lol).
And I don't want to say that I haven't at least been TRYING to keep my eye on the ball because we have been having good healthy WW meals, low in points but those meals are combined by one or two days of crap.
I have also started smoking again and I don't know why.
Okay, I know why. I'm an emotional what-ever-eater-smoker.
Losing my job, coupled with losing my friends (it's sad but the people at work were all my friends in a way where you LOVE going to work because you work with great people and they were people who I saw ALL the time, therefore friends who I got to hang out with ALL the time), coupled with school (and apparently getting caught up on my homework lol), coupled with the change and not knowing what is going on. Is another company going to come in and buy the old company out? How long do I have on my mini vacation? When will I have to go back and change my life all over again?
I kind of feel like I can't "really" relax.
G A W D! All of that sounds so pitiful.
Because I KNOW, that getting back on the horse and riding all the way to skinny town is possible, and embracing change is really the only thing that you can do when things become so dynamic in your life. But you know... you know when you feel so out of control with your weight that it's nice, it's SO NICE to have something, one thing in your world that you can control and know what the out come will be?
I think I just answered my own problem. *le sigh*
The light just went off. :)
Thanks for listening guys. <3
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