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So in my last entry I talked about how I was doing well with exercising but struggled with food. Accountability is a pretty big issue for me. The great part about the small group training is that it gives me that accountability because I've made an appointment with a trainer and I know I need to be there. Food was still an issue for me and I must be honest, food is still an issue for me. But I finally decided that I needed to invest in myself. I joined weight watchers.
After 5 years of not being able to do it correctly with calorie counting I knew that I needed something that was simplified for my busy life. I spent all these years berating myself because what once worked, wasn't working any longer. I couldn't figure out how I was able to count calories and exercise at a regular gym 5 years ago and successfully lose almost 30 lbs and not be able to do it again. I honestly can't say I've fully figured it out now. But what I can say is that people and situations change. My situation back then was different. I had more time, I had friends who were on the same journey, I had "C" who was my accountability buddy through-out, and I wasn't comfortable in my relationship. When you aren't comfortable and you start thinking about the fact that you could be thrust into the real world with dating & judgement being passed every second, you tend to feel the desperation to try to be thin. My relationship improved and we went back to being happy and comfortable - and we stayed there since. I no longer had the same friends on the same journey - people got busy, people moved, people had different priorities. I no longer had the accountability buddy who was there daily even when I didn't want her to be there. Like I said, things change.
So while I have always splurged on myself for material things I decided that I needed to hold back on the material things and splurge in a different way - by investing in myself and my health. The small group training gym is unbelievably expensive, but I'm going to figure out how to make it work. Weight Watchers is not nearly as expensive as people make it seem - I think it's a good way to spend your money if it works and guess what? It works for me!
I've been on weight watchers since the beginning of this week and I've been dropping weight daily so far. When I first started at the gym I was 243. When I started WW I was 242. This morning I weighed in at 237.8. Whether it's water weight or fat - who cares! It's a nudge to continue following the new healthier lifestyle. Now, I'll admit that I have yet to get rid of the bad habits of eating too much food even when I know I shouldn't be eating it but I LOVE that WW guides you towards healthier foods since the healthier foods are lower or zero points. I find myself choosing vegetables for dinner instead of carbs. And I'm currently finding myself shopping for healthier lunch options - on the menu today is a baby spinach salad with hard boiled eggs, almonds, and a honey dijon vinaigrette. Yes, I know there will be the occasional slip up where I get the Italian sandwich, chips and a diet coke (like last night, for example) but practice makes perfection - I'll keep trying and practicing new healthier habits until they stick.
I've even prepared for this weekend. With mother's day around the corner and friends visiting on Saturday from Florida - there are plans all weekend long to eat out so I've planned everything I will allow myself to have on Saturday and Sunday making sure that I stay within my calories. I will use up all my allowed weekly smartpoints this weekend but that's okay! That's what they are there for and it will force me to go back to the healthy lifestyle at the start of the next work week.
You have to find what works for you and stick to it. Finally, I feel like I've found what works for me. So happy :)
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