Vickiauntmick's Journal, 16 September 2018

You are okay. This coming week will be better. Please work on your positives. There are many more of them than the negatives. Love that you took a walk in the woods.  

Stay strong. Dust yourself off and get back on the horse. You can do it. 

What you are feeling is normal. Take a moment to breathe and don’t beat up on yourself. You are human. Just take one step at a time... remember it is a process. You can do it!  

Hey, a higher calorie day isn't so bad ever now and then. It makes your body think you aren't restricting calories, and helps you into the right direction. It takes 3500 calories to produce one pound of fat, so the damage is minimal. Keep going forward knowing you're still progressing. I hope today is a happier day for you. 

u go girl 

yes eat that cheese girl !!! 

eat that cheese like u own that cheese 

omg yessssss 

It's your cheat day 

^^^ we love cheat days 

Okay so you are getting in your protein for the day, plus some calcium and vitamin A. I had a bit of a breakdown this morning, too. It happens. We move on. 

definitely worse things you could cheat with...youll be ok :) hang in there...drink some water  

I'm so sorry you are having a rough time - don't be hard on yourself - take care and start back on your journey when you can - you can do it! 

Thank you everyone. There certainly is a ton of people that have my back. Basically what set me off yesterday was my dad, out of the blue, looked at me and said "If you are happy with your body, then I won't say anything. But you really need to stop eating so much. I eat this one slice of pizza and I'm full. You sit there and eat the rest of the pizza and I'm just thinking damn!" I had no response other than to fly off the handle that because I'm fat, everyone feels the need to watch everything I eat, as I eat it, the sit there judging me and talk about me like I dont notice. Its no fucking wonder I am a binge eater. I feel powerless and ashamed...and shamed by just being looked at. And I obviously have zero self confidence 

Sounds like your Dad needs some "tact" Maybe next time you could say to him "Dad what you said hurt my feelings, I know you are concerned about me and I appreciate that but next time you have something to say about me please use some tact and think before you speak"  

I think senility is kicking in. Memory loss. He's very combative when you try to tell him that a conversation went one way, then he swears it didn't... Or just doesnt remember the conversation happening at all. It's just a little bit right now, but my moving home this year and living here next to him makes me a target since I see him every day 

Aww I’m so sorry your dad was being so cruel 😞 family especially always seem to think they can say whatever they want, in whatever way they want and it’s fine. But it’s not. I tend to ignore almost every single word that comes out of my fathers mouth (I’m living at home as well; I understand your pain). He’s negative and enjoys being mean. Just try to ignore him and focus on you. It’s really hard to stay on track when full of emotional hurt and anxiety. Just remind yourself that your future is worth going with out the momentary pleasure from binging (I have this problem as well 🙁)  

I understand totally, what I would do when I started seeing the rudeness coming on I would get up and say "gotta go" see you later. I didn't give the opportunity for the talk to start. Good luck! 

Just breathe and start fresh tomorrow. We all have our good days and bad days. We all are here because we have issues with food. Just remember tomorrow is a brand new day. You can do it! You have a lot of support on here with ppl who will not judge you because we have all been there before.  

Oh Vicki! I’m so sorry. Family is especially cruel. And I agree with everyone here that we all have set backs. You’re going to get through this! You are strong and we do have your back. Sending lots of love ❤️