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Weight History
showing entries 11 to 15 of 912
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11 September 2023
I don't know what ya'll are doing on the elliptical but oh my goodness. I keep forgetting my fitbit so I decided I would log what the machine said. The machine said 680.. Fatsecret says an hour on the elliptical should have been 820. On what universe?? Is this what that nutty guy that goes all out for a solid hour burns? Honestly I thought he was just nuts and wanted to impress a girl with zero resistance to show her that he too could be the coyote on looney tunes. Crap now I need to do the discrete gym walk and see what that guy burns! I was feelin pretty good about myself till I saw that. I'm still feeling proud of myself. I went. I did it. I'm getting it done.
Today has been a challenge. I woke up at 3:30 with a work dream that left me wanting to get back up and work on a spreadsheet. There is nothing about that comment that should sound rational or sane. I left a meeting mid meeting because I would have lost my bleeping mind. I went off on a worker for stepping outside his line... And... I tried to call my mom. We have a very distant relationship at this point. I had bought her one of those app frames over a year ago so we could send her pictures of the kids. They see her maybe once a year if we are lucky. She finally set it up. I sent pictures. She didn't acknowledge she was getting them. So I figured I would call her and see if she was getting them. She is. She's in Ohio with her boyfriends daughter for a simple procedure. Even my niece went with her to support the girl. I had 3 years of brain scans and was told I had everything from tumors to aneurisms. Luckily I had neither. She didn't even bother to call to see how those tests went. We never had a falling out we've just grown distant to the point that she doesn't even seem to care. When she had a cancer scare I called her or my sister every day because I couldn't be there. I'm over it. I'm over putting effort into a relationship with my own mother. Can I get a new one of those? Surely there is someone in a nursing home that wouldn't mind being adopted by a chicken/duck/tiny human raising crazy clan. Seriously.. my kids nicknamed my mom grandma far far away because they couldn't remember her name.
Sigh.. deep breath.. I can only control what I can control. Today I am controlling my ability to get in a good workout and eat like an adult. I should look more seriously into that writing thing. I'm amazed anyone reads these ramblings. You guys obviously have not found smutty novels yet.
(7 comments)
01 September 2023
I think I might need a diet buddy. Someone asked about Noom yesterday and I've tried it and quit it. Didn't see a ton of results. I think it's because you have to be in the right mindset and personally I need someone who will slap cupcakes out of my hands. The other tricky part is sometimes I just don't like people. My job is stressful. I manage people which is basically being a mom at work only to come home and be a mom at home. I spend 80% of my day either telling someone no, getting them something, asking them to do something only to be ignored or listening to them tell me they know more than me.. when they don't. So some days I just don't want to people. So IF I can find a cupcake slapper that cupcake slapper has to realize that I may hide from them in the bathroom. Which used to be a safe spot but the boys figured out my hiding spot so now they come to the bathroom door to ask for things. Or they linger outside in the hallway so you have zero privacy. Can I train a puppy to be a cupcake slapper? That might be better.
Today's whys / inspirations / insane ramblings are:
- St. Lucia. Before we had a challenging year the BF was thinking about a trip to St. Lucia but the cost was a bit outside our range at the time. Next year is our 5 yrs of putting up with one another anniversary. I'm not huge on anniversaries. It's one more day for me to forget. BUT. A romantic couples vacation sounds like an AMAZING idea. Feeling good in my swimsuit while spending the day with BF at a swim up bar sounds amazing.. So from now until next July it's challenge swimsuit time. Oh and not eating out so I can save every penny towards the trip.
- Because my arms wave. Sometimes I don't want them to wave. Sometimes I just want to pick something up. My arm still feels the need to wave to people. Sometimes it's like ocean waves. See I can lift my arms straight out right now and wave. Now my co-workers are looking at me weird.
- Because my calves have a muffin top. If I wear my muck boots I have a muffin top. WTF.. only I would have muffin top calves.
(4 comments)
31 August 2023
First thank you everyone for the kind comments yesterday. It is validating to know I'm not the only person who sees the situation with the Ex and thinks WTF. He's an ex for who he turned out to be. It's still sad that he's now showing that side to his own kids. I called yesterday and I'm going to start going through family therapists to find one for the boys and me. I think it would be a good idea for them to go to someone who isn't me. I'm sure they will hear more than I would because the boys worry their dad will get in trouble or I will get mad. Good news is we talked and both boys agreed they want to walk home every day after school instead of riding the bus to their dads so that will limit a little more of the crazy. Not that I'm not crazy. I'm the crazy that will try to convince the boys that the kitchen gremlins ate the last fruit rollup to avoid the fight of who ate the last rollup. Kitchen gremlins are the worst.
Today I'm getting back on track despite the fact that I woke up wanting brownies. I'm kicking butts and my tongue. Oh my goodness.. how and spicy quest chips have me sweating. I think this counts as a workout. I'm breathing heavy, sweating, and I am feeling the burn. oooh doggie. But.. it's a smart chip choice. Today I'm making smarter choices. Even if they make my tongue go numb... ok it seemed smarter.
Today's motivation is..
- Because I don't want to turn into my family. My mom is heavier and limps around everywhere, my niece just keep getting bigger year after year, and my sister managed to lose some weight but she never moves, smokes, and looks 10 years older than she is.. just no. I will beat genetics.
- Because I beat the other soccer moms and if felt good. It's practice week. I don't really want to just sit in a chair for 90 minutes while the kids run drills. Instead I started walking the track while they pracice. The other mom's that walk made it 2 rounds. I made it 6. I was sweaty, hair was sticking up everywhere, and a hot mess. BUT. I got my 10k steps in and I felt better for it.
- Because I want to fit through stadium seats without turning sideways or taking out a child on the way. These hips can take someone out.
(7 comments)
30 August 2023
Doing a bit of a reset today. I really need to figure out how to deal with stress/life/cake. My youngest had his birthday over the weekend which was his dad's weekend and it's become a thing. I reminded him of his son's birthday for the second time and asked him if he had plans for his son on Thursday. We celebrated his birthday on Thursday because his sister was going to college and he goes to his dads Friday at noon. We went to the jump place and Dave and Busters with the BF and his daughter. Fast forward... I picked him up on Sunday and he was upset. His dad did nothing. Not even a cake. Luckily I called him before picking him up while I was at the store so I picked up a cake. Dad's girlfriend overheard the conversation so she started making him a cake. It was still baking when I picked him up. WTF. She's just as bad as he is. Worse because she barely tolerates the fact that he has kids and they've been together for over 4 years. She moved in a week after I moved out.
Now I know.. the youngest is probably slightly spoiled. Yes we did do something fun with him on Thursday minus a cake and singing because we went out and he didnt want cake at the restaurant. We offered. But COME ON. His dad could at least put a little effort into a 9th birthday for a kid who idolizes him. Ok rant over. I should rant sooner. Maybe then I wouldn't angry eat cake. I won't even get into the part where his grandma just wanted to watch him eat cake and I didn't know so we ate cake and then she was supposed to go to the Ex's for cake but the girlfriend just sliced the cake up and handed it to the youngest randomly with a candle. She didn't light it. They didn't sing. Maybe they were all dropped on their heads.
Today I will get healthier because...
- I obviously have to outlive the Ex. He sucks as a parent.
- Because I want to be that girl where you meet her and she says I lost 80 lbs and you immediately go nooooo. What? When did you ever way that much? I met her this weekend. Her name is Jorrie and she's an inspiration.
- Because my jeans are all tight and after we get through Sumtember I need those things to fit.
(8 comments)
30 August 2023
Weigh-in:
225.6 lb
lost so far:
0 lb
still to go:
95.6 lb
Diet followed N/A
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