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I'm well on my way back to the "good place". This weekend gave me quite a hiccup in my weigh-ins - but what a fun ride it has been! It did come with a price tag on it though, and with a mental penalty. More about that later.
So, the concert Friday night was SO MUCH FUN! We played at a big 40th birthday party, and people were fun - they were getting into it, dancing, drinking, partying, and we got to be the entertainment! What more could you want? We had pretty good sound, something we're still learning to make, and I think we had a pretty good amount of energy. People really liked it, we were told. :)
For the first time, we upped the setlist to THREE sets. We're not playing three times 45 minutes - not bad for a band who's only been playing together for one year, I should say. The goal is to create a fourth set, so we can do three hours of entertainment. That'd be pretty cool.
So, I was home Saturday morning at 2 AM. At 7 AM, the alarm went off, and Wife and I were on the train to Copenhagen at 8:11 AM. I was TIRED, but hanging in there.
We didn't have too much of a plan going in there, other than that I wanted to look at a new blu-ray player, as the old one had given out on us. We use the player to watch TV-shows also, long live online technology, so no blu-ray means no TV-shows. This will not do in our household, so this was top priority.
We ended up buying a Panasonic, with tons of cool features. A favorite is that it's connectible to the Internet and will play Internet radio. Nice. Now I don't need cables to connect my laptop.
After purchasing it, we went for a little lunch at a Turkish buffet. We did very reasonable there, as I told Wife that we were gonna have a nice dinner out later. The lunch basically consisted of one plate of food each. It wasn't hard to restrict ourselves at all, knowing that more (and better) food would come later. :)
So, after lunch, we went to a hobby store for Wife. She needed some colors for a project she's doing. She's creating these AMAZING dolls, and she is doing a Dias De La Muerta themed one. I can't wait to see it! She's got some amazing skills, Wife. She keeps impressing me.
Being done with all the shopping, I had a little surprise for Wife. Here in our little town, there is only one movie theater, and it sucks. It's hot, old, not well-aircontitioned, and generally not a joy.
Obviously we don't go to the movies here. We watch them at home on the big screen.
Wife had mentioned that she'd love to watch the Avengers movie that just came out. So I had booked tickets for the afternoon show, at the coolest movie theater in all of Denmark. It's a very stylish, classic theater, but the one that is by far the most state-of-the-art movie theater in Denmark (and then some). It's a 1200 seater, and it's frickin' huge!
So we went, and saw The Avengers. Both Wife and I loved it - it was so much fun. If you're in any way into the whole super hero thing that's going on in the recent movies, then this is a MUST SEE!
After the movies, we were debating a little what to have for dinner. We settled on a steak house with a ribs buffet. We don't really get ribs here in Denmark - it's not a tradition like it is in the US and many other places. I miss beef ribs like crazy - I used to eat them all the time during the years I lived in Texas.
So we found a place here, and much to my surprise it wasn't just port that was on the buffet. They had some very reasonable quality beef ribs.
I probably had too many. I really didn't care. And that's probably the main reason for my ridiculously high weigh-in yesterday.
The weigh-in today is much better, though still high. I fought hard all day yesterday to not snack, and it was limited to a home made smoothie, which is just milk, frozen fruit and sweetener. No biggie. I ended up way low on calories, but I figured it's okay after a weekend of indulgences.
I didn't get much sleep though. I was over-tired when we came home from Copenhagen, and I couldn't sleep. I spend half the night setting up the blu-ray player and getting it all working. I am very particular about sound and settings and learning all the details of what it can do, so I spent several hours doing this while Wife was sleeping.
Two nights with about 3-4 hours of proper sleep.
Then there was last night. Not much better. I am stressing over work again. This makes me NOT able to sleep. I try to focus on my breathing when I lie there, and most times it helps me falling asleep. But my thoughts were nagging at me too hard to be pushed aside, and I am really suffering this morning. So tired, so stressed, and worried for a bunch of my cases. I need to get situated on them again, need to know what's going on so I can rest. I need some piece of mind.
Today I have so much work, so much typing and evaluation - it's ridiculous. It's gonna be a tough day, I think. I hope I make it though it in one piece.
Something stress related happened this morning that I have never had before, and this really worries me. I had a small "hissy fit", I just couldn't handle everything. It was like everything just went wrong. My eggs didn't boil right. My can of tuna that I opened to make lunch opened wrong so it was all a mess. The coffee machine screwed up and I had coffee everywhere. It probably was just me being super tired and not doing right, but eventually I just had enough. I threw out ALL my food, breakfast, lunch, the whole thing. I had it almost done, too! Then I sat down and just stared at the floor for a moment. Damn.
This is NOT something I want to experience on a regular basis.
I'm not sure what did me in - is it the lack of sleep (three nights with just a few hours is simply not enough for me) or is it work, or is it both?
I think that I stress more about work when I don't sleep. I have too much time where I can lie there and worry about it. I have too much time for thoughts about it, at times where I can't do anything.
I need to get situated, and I will. I hope I can do this soon. Stress is a bitch, and she's NOT welcome.
Phew. That was quite a handful, huh? From all the fun and games in the world, to the deep dark place that makes Kingkeld angry. "You won't like me when I'm angry". At least, that's what The Hulk says. I'm glad I don't turn into a huge green bundle of rage. :) However, that incident this morning DID scare me. I feel that I lost control, and I do not like losing control.
It makes today seems really hard to get through. It started off bad, and as much as I am generally positive about things, today just seems really hard to get through.
Today, I'm thankful for:
- Having Wife around me at work. Just knowing that she's there will make me feel that it's all gonna be okay. I love her so much.
- Weight coming down more than 1 kg since yesterday.
- Having this journal to let out so many thoughts.
- YOU if you read all this! :) I'm impressed!
Wow. It was actually HARD to make a "Thankful list" today. I'm just not that positive right now, though I try to be. Like I said, I'm sleepy and grumpy.
Anyways, please have a better day than the one I'm having. That shouldn't be too hard to accomplish. Sometimes, like days like today, it can be hard to see it, but rest assured - Life IS good. :)
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