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Well Curves must be paying off, albeit waaay too slowly for my liking weight wise, still thinking about it, it could be a bonus - the numbers on the magic stage aren't changing that much, but in the mirror, and just in general, how I feel, and how fat is sitting on my frame, I can feel a difference, you know what I mean right? (I know you're nodding here, so I'll go on...) so although the magic stage isn't telling me much change, I'm putting that down to the whole "building muscle, losing fat, muscle weighs more than fat" and knowing I've more than likely still been expending more than consuming, I *should* still be at a deficit which kinda accounts for the tiny drop.. (57.5 today - 57.4 after a pooh woot, 57.7 yesterday, 57.9 Tuesday.). But, like I said, not all bad that it's not "dropping off" and odd for me to say (yes I still want to be 50, but surreptitiously) so if I'm getting weighed by my endo and can get by with somehow looking bonier/skinnier/fitting smaller stuff and keeping a higher number on the scale, well, that just keeps everyone happy!
On a bad note, mum asked yesterday, if B was ready to go back to school - I said quite firmly she's not going back. Mum's pissed at me now, giving me the silent treatment about it all. Funnily enough, the half tin of tuna I was swallowing at the time (lunch) turned to sawdust and my head immediately said "why'd you eat that? You weren't even hungry (I wasn't, it was just left over) you pig!" ah confrontation and EDs!!
On a side note, Liss is being her usual manipulative self; You know how I sent her a Facebook message telling her not to come to boxing day and I'm sick of her denigrating me all the time etc, that real friends don't step on each other to get places etc, and this was me putting up a boundary and she had to respect it, I'd see if we could be friends at some point in the future etc... Well next thing I know, she doesn't reply, then I figure out she's blocked me on Facebook. No big deal. She only ever took stuff so it's no great loss, doesn't register. But then! She "happened" to run into mum at the shops, ( she lives Hornsby, mum Gordon, go figure) and tattletales like a 8yo, (I'd already said to mum why I'd not wanted her at boxing day but mum "forgot") anyway get this-apparently Liss asks my mum, to ask me to call her tomorrow, her birthday, to let her know we are still friends!! Um how old are you?!? Fuck off!!! I said to mum that was really manipulative, that if she had something to say or ask of me, she had my number, and could pick up the phone! She didn't have an issue with anything I'd written in the initial message, or enough of an issue to *do/say* anything *to me* about it, so too bad, whining to other people is not going to score points. And, mum didn't think it was manipulative for Liss to ask her to ask me to call her (on her birthday, after the second anniversary of Daisy's death - yes she threw the dead baby guilt card in there too! Unbelievable!) to "make sure we're still friends". Sorry, it's not gonna wash this time. If me not making that call means we aren't friends, then fuck, guess we're not. I'm So Cut. /end Liss rant/
Ending on a good note... I saw some ribs today... And chest bones... And if I breathe in hard, my sternum! Yay! C'mon, get on the bandwagon, tis gooood...!
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126.5 lb
Lost so far: 91.3 lb.
Still to go: 9.7 lb.
Diet followed reasonably well.
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losing 4.1 lb a week
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