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Someone said something in response to another members journal that really bothered me today. She said "Feel free to look at my large 245lb body with disgust". That hurt me on a really deep level and I know that it shouldn't have, because she wasn't talking about me, but at the same time, she has been conditioned to believe that it is ok for people to look at her with disgust.
I don't know if she has been heavy her whole life, I don't know her, but I have and my whole life has been wrought with looks of disgust. People aren't afraid to tell me that I am a "fat B*tch" or "disgusting lardass", things of that nature. I once had a girl tell me "People like you never last so, so why don't you just go fold shirts or something" when she was supposed to be training me on the job. I have been looked at with disgust, contempt, hatred, pity, I have been talked about loudly by grown adults. I have been harassed and ridiculed, and made to feel like garbage. So much so, that I stopped going into stores, stopped enjoying time with my family and friends because I was worried about people making fun of me.
It is never ok to treat someone less than human just because they do not fit into the mold of what people consider "normal" or "acceptable".
Do I have a weight problem? Yes, I do.
Do I know that its not healthy? Yes, I do.
Am I still a human being, who deserves to be able to walk though a store without whispers and mean looks? Yes, I am, and I do!!
So, no please, do not look at my large 430lb body with disgust. I know its not perfect, but I am doing my best.
I do hope that the person who posted that understand that just because she is overweight, doesn't mean that she deserves to be treated badly. Weight doesn't define who we are as people, it is only our outward appearance.
Diet Calendar Entries for 20 February 2018:
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1042 kcal
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Fat: 60.60g | Prot: 106.77g | Carb: 11.20g.
Lunch: Hellmann's Real Mayonnaise, Jimmy John's Avocado Spread, Jimmy John's #11 Country Club Unwich. Dinner: Del Monte Cut Green Beans, Hidden Valley Ranch Salad Dressing, Pork Chops (Top Loin, Boneless, Lean Only). more...
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5501 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Driving - 30 minutes, Desk Work - 8 hours, Resting - 7 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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1 to 20 of 39
 Comments
❤️Great words of wisdom Kaaryn, fat shaming is so wrong on so many levels.
20 Feb 18 by member: 8Patty
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20 Feb 18 by member: Bird Fancier
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So agree with your thoughts. I have been the subject of the "haters" plenty of times, but at 69 years of age it just doesn't seem to matter so much....some of those haters aren't even here any longer. (here, meaning alive.)
20 Feb 18 by member: Sally Forest
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20 Feb 18 by member: bizzybee38
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Well written and well said. Kudos to you!!
20 Feb 18 by member: kattay
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I don't think she should have said that. it was degrading to all of us. but... we are here to do something about it!! you are beautiful very pretty lady and WE can do this! hold that pretty head up and let do this!! :)
20 Feb 18 by member: cherik1
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20 Feb 18 by member: SinnaBunz
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Shaming anyone because of their outward appearance is so sad and never ok. I love this post! Thank you for your words or wisdom. I really believe if we talk to people, get to know them even a little, outward appearance begins to melt away. You are a beautiful person, especially in the ways that matter!
20 Feb 18 by member: momma6224
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Love you Klynn82 ! You will succeed with your wonderful attitude and smile!
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You inspire me, I’m on day 2 and having tons of doubt about the mess I’m in. Thanks for your sweet post.
20 Feb 18 by member: pennymurrell
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we are more than these sacks of flesh we wear
20 Feb 18 by member: daveserra
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Amen, you have a beautiful heart and that is what matters most.
20 Feb 18 by member: Gingerk65
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When people are mean, it speaks volumes about their character, not yours. Sending love and encouragement. ❤
20 Feb 18 by member: Becc@
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You should NEVER put someone down due to their outward appearance. You DO NOT know their struggles. YOU HAVE NEVER WALKED ON THEIR SHOES! Don’t judge what you don’t know. Keep you head up Don’t let their attitudes get you down. Give them your biggest smile and say “I AM BLESSED”
20 Feb 18 by member: Gypsyrn
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21 Feb 18 by member: CerinaBee
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I point out: this is something someone said about herself. She may feel that way about others, but she didn't make those comments on someone else's post. The sad thing is that she feels that way about herself-I'd go so far as to say that if she hates herself at this weight, she's doomed to failure. Because she hates herself and weight is just an excuse, Pity is what's needed, and support if she wants it.
21 Feb 18 by member: Kahaz
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Coming on here, in the public forum, takes a lot of courage. We are all human and all on our own individual journey to better health and wellness. Anyone who can be negative about that has some serious self esteem issues. When someone treats others with hate and disrespect, it says more about them. It's self hatred manifested. It still hurts to hear those mean words or discouragements, but I encourage you to take a moment and remind yourself of all the good you are when those negative words hit you. You are not fat, you have fat. You are a good person. (((hugs)))
21 Feb 18 by member: CoachKitty
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I consider myself a very loving and compassionate person. I treat people with respect. I have not critizised anyone but myself. However If you look at successful people you will see they take criticism. If you look at athletes you will see there coaches coming down hard on them and you will see them taking it and striving for better and winning gold meddles. I have not made the first negative comment on here about some else. We are here because we messed up. Bottom line. And we want to fix it. Regardless of the reason. We
have to put or feelings aside and face reality.
21 Feb 18 by member: bonnie senn
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And one more thing. You are a very beautiful lady. Be encouraged. You can do this.
21 Feb 18 by member: bonnie senn
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I dont want anyone to get the wrong idea, she said it about herself, not anyone else. It was directed at herself. What I was saying was that it was sad to me, and struck a deep chord, because I have lived my whole life getting the looks of disgust. And thats no okay. Its not okay to accept that as the norm. I was just saying that no, I dont want anyone to look at me that way, even if there are days that I look at myself that way, because I am human, and as much as anyone else, I just want to be accepted. Her comment was not direct at me, about me, or anyone else.
21 Feb 18 by member: Klynn82
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