ny_shelly's Journal, 16 March 2016

I would like to get to 299 by the end of July, before I go on vacation. It will give me good incentive to stick to my food plan because I don't want to ever go into 300 ever again.

It will be hard work. I had a mini binge last night, but it could have been way worse. I went to Boston Market for dinner. Just ate white meat chicken, saved the side salads for today (I got 2 salads instead of the hi carb options) and then I found the dreaded yummy delicious corn bread.

Well, I stared at that thing. I ate the ends off. Then I started imagining going through the drive through and getting a 6 pack. My hands shook. I swallowed and there was a lump there.

NO NO NO

Step away from the corn bread.

I threw it out the window where a happy bunch of seagulls swooped down and gobbled it up.

Whew, that was a close one.

Later I still didn't do great. I ate a bunch of cheese and a few tablespoons of peanut butter. I know if I had switched to being mindful and done a mindfulness exercise I could have avoided it.

But I gotta be honest. It is like being addicted to drugs. This food gives me a relief from anxiety because I have been binge eating for 30 years. My brain is conditioned for it. It knows when the food comes, the dopamine is released, and ahhhh i feel so much better.

I am being kind to myself about it because you can't fix it in 6 days. I have to keep looking at the big picture.

Diet Calendar Entry for 16 March 2016:
1494 kcal Fat: 94.90g | Prot: 120.81g | Carb: 32.37g.   Breakfast: McDonald's Sausage Patty, McDonald's Scrambled Eggs. Lunch: Ken's Steak House Lite Northern Italian, Boston Market Market Chopped Side Salad without Dressing. Dinner: Mozzarella Cheese, Parmesan Cheese (Shredded), Beef Meatballs, Chicken Wing (Skin Eaten), Chicken Wing (Skin Not Eaten). more...

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Comments 
Wow - awesome job tossing the cornbread - cheese and peanut butter are less of a problem if you are on a low carb plan! 
16 Mar 16 by member: HCB
The struggle is real!! Good job, and seagulls need to eat too. 
16 Mar 16 by member: rhontique
Wow what a post. Fabulous control with the corn bread. That's what I want. 
16 Mar 16 by member: Sarah1950
You did great! Big pat on the back. Thank you for the honesty, most of us have been there,it takes a lot of willpower to throw out good cornbread. 
16 Mar 16 by member: Moonfairie

     
 

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