|
ok, there is no denying it, I"m kind of depressed :-( not so much due to my stubborn weight loss (it is creeping up again) or lack of work (looking for part time after leaving my full time job) or isolation & not being able to travel to see friends & my kids & grands (due to covid19) or 'surprise' bill that popped up (at least it won't be due for a few months but still a large $), or other things (there are always other things, right?) But now, a friend (guess he could be called a boy friend of sorts) is kind of 'ghosting' me (a new phase I've heard the younger generation using lately). I kind of knew what it meant but I actually looked it up the definition to see if I had it right. Below is a web definition;
"Ghosting is basically rejection, only without the finality. It is when someone stops answering your texts or calls without explanation. This often happens out of nowhere. It can leave you feeling confused, hurt, and paranoid. ... Because it's a lot easier than straight up telling someone you're not feeling it anymore"
WOW that really says it ALL. He would respond to a daily text I would make normally just saying "Good Morning, how is your day going" but then stopped replying on the weekends and would reply with 1 or 2 worders on the week days. Does not answer my calls or reply to phone messages or emails. I can find excuses for him (my normal defense method), but I'm through with it.
EKKK, it is so tempting to just text him my routine "good morning" yesterday & today but NO, I need to just STOP IT. But it is getting me down :-( I have known this guy for over 30 years (not my boyfriend for that long). I just can't understand why he won't take the time to talk to me face to face. I really want to just ask him, when can we get together to 'talk' but should I? He will probably just ignore that text or call!
I'm just tired of it!
Hope ALL is well in FS-Land & take care to ALL
|
 Comments
Hey sweety it’s ok to have emotions in that dead ass meaningless world of non relationship. It’s totally ok. It hurts so much that words can not describe. You are such a fighter. What’s great about you is that you know and can identify what’s bringing you down. You care about others and that’s amazing. I can relate. The only person that you need to care is you. As selfish as it sounds those boys will come and go and at the end of that road you are there alone. Make your alone time happy fill it with joy. Dancing yes!!! Just stupid dancing even if you don’t know how will help. Plus it will burn calories. Don’t give up on yourself and my best recommendation get boyfriends better like 5 cause non of them will be what you need but all of them will occupy you. ;) you got this girl!
25 Aug 20 by member: natnath
|
Oh thank you Natnath you brought a smile to my face and I actually had to LAUGH OUT LOUD :-) I appreciate your sincere and uplifting words & thoughts.
25 Aug 20 by member: JMA312
|
I’m emotional eater so I totally understand how weight can sneak up on you. I’m glad I could cheer you up a little. 😘
25 Aug 20 by member: natnath
|
JMA, it’s really too bad that everyone can’t just speak their truths and keep us from having to guess and just eventually give up. He is obviously not worth your time. You are smart and beautiful and obviously a very caring person. As my younger sis says:”You do you boo-boo” I say ghost him! Delete his number and if he ever makes time to send you a text, don’t return it. I’m not being hateful by saying that, but you have better things to put your energy in. He obviously isn’t one of those. You will find your motivation to be a healthier you. I know this new COVID world we live in can be very lonely sometimes. I’m sending you virtual hugs and prayers and loving thoughts.
25 Aug 20 by member: sunnybutterfly
|
Do NOT text him again. And when /if he texts you...don't respond right away. Don't make an ass of yourself. Know your worth. Never play second fiddle. Take time to be the best you that you can. Ok, that's all I got. 😉
25 Aug 20 by member: davidsprincess
|
We can cure overweight with diet & exercise, covid will be controlled & then you'll have your family & friends back, as for him, well, You Just Can't Fix Stupid. You keep your chin up & know we are there for you.
25 Aug 20 by member: Alnona
|
Focus on you. You can only control what you do. Keep your spirits up and do something you enjoy!
25 Aug 20 by member: ivy mint
|
Is it possible that he may be unwell? Maybe he got COVID and is unable to communicate with you at this time. Sometimes people are to sick to let others know they are unwell. There are always other explanations. I would leave him alone and give him the benefit of the doubt. Just work on yourself and say a prayer for him, that if he is unwell, you find out about it. The isolation of Covid has made it difficult for people to be empathetic towards each other. It's possible that he may have things going on in his life that he doesn't want to share. Just work on your own life situation and if he does reach out, you will have good news to report. Hang in there, this too shall pass. It always does. You sound blessed to have kids, grandkids, friends, your health, and are able to work. When a door closes, God always manages to at least open a window. :)
25 Aug 20 by member: JavaMom
|
Remember, he’s the one that has to live with the guilt of “ghosting” you. You did nothing wrong, but don’t embarrass yourself by trying to get in touch with him. Mark it off as a lesson learned. You deserve better! ❤️
25 Aug 20 by member: roberta.filomena
|
Thank you ALL for your comments & virtual support. It is greatly appreciated. Some comments brought smiles, some a 'nod of my head' & a verbal 'yes' others were tough love BUT was well said and appreciated :-) I do know he has some situations in his life right now that are taking his time so there is that (one of the excuses I give him) BUT through out the over 30 years we have known each other we have always been able to at least talk. I will give him this TIME, however long it may be and not contact him. I'm going to print out this journal entry along with the comments to re-read if I get the temptation to reach out to him unsolicited. Yes, in the past this would have caused me to "fall off mine wagon" HARD & start drinking & eating all that is not good for me BUT not this time. I will continue to take care of ME. I'm also going to add this comment as a journal post so I have it IN MY FACE :-) I Love you all in FS-Land :-)
25 Aug 20 by member: JMA312
|
I totally agree. Dont text or call. if he does, ignore. Try to get involved in other things i know it's hard with virus but you can phone chat, volunteer to help elderly, etc and soon this won't be top priority. You are strong and can do anything you put your mind to.🤗🙏😷
25 Aug 20 by member: carol655
|
Great advice has already been given. You have a good plan, I hope you stick with it. You don't need anyone to disrespect you. He will contact you when he is ready, then you can ghost him.
25 Aug 20 by member: kattay
|
| |
|
|
| |
Submit a Comment
You must sign in to submit a comment
|
|
|
Other Related Links
Members
|
JMA312's weight history
|