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Weight History
showing entries 6 to 10 of 10
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01 May 2017
Weigh-in:
307.0 lb
lost so far:
3.0 lb
still to go:
57.0 lb
Diet followed reasonably well
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losing 21.0 lb a week
30 April 2017
Today I am off. I don't know if it is the gloomy weather or the fact I am so damn bored, but I am completely off. I feel horrible. My anxiety has been at an all time high today. I need to just breath relax and take it easy but it's so difficult. I have a really bad headache, my body is cold but my head is hot...I hate this feeling. I think i am going to meditate and do some light workouts. Hopefully that'll ease this for me. What I'm feeling right now is horrible...Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. I barely was able to eat much today. Tomorrow I need to get 3 meals in.
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30 April 2017
Weigh-in:
310.0 lb
lost so far:
0 lb
still to go:
60.0 lb
Diet followed reasonably well
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steady weight
29 April 2017
So tomorrow for surely I will begin my journey. Today I basically am upset w/ myself and decided to have some doritos and truth be told I do not even like doritos. I think I ate out of boredom to be honest and I hate that I did it but no point in whining about it now. However at my weight, I have no room for screw ups. Good thing I started this fatsecret just now. Tomorrow I will strive for a better eating habit. Continue getting in my 3k steps til i can work my way up to 10k steps a day. I have to stop being stupid. I know what is bad for me but yet, i tend to go for it anyways. It's no wonder I have so much anxiety. I am afraid that i will die from being so heavy, but yet I go and make a dumb choice like today and then dwell on it all night. Literally losing sleep because of how guilty I feel after I eat shit foods. I need to get it together. I need to realize the harm i am doing to my body. I kow what healthy foods I need to eat. i actually love clean eats, so I don't get what tempts me to be foolish. It is also hard to believe that the food I usually pick out for myself are usually healthy eats, however I will go and snack on my fiance's chips, cookies...I am not gonna tell him what to eat you know. he isn't even big. He's a average built. It does throw me off however cause he'll want take out and if I refuse to eat it, he gets a bit upset. I tell him go ahead eat what you want, it's not like you're obese or anything but why do i have to eat that? Sometimes I will to make him happy, but he told me last night he will support me on this journey. he sees what it has done to me. I have depression, was diagnosed with PTSD, Bipolar2, and tied to that is my panic disorder, minor agoraphobia with hypochondriac tendencies. In truth, I believe most of these issues developed with my obesity. Ever since I got this heavy, I have lost myself. I truly hate the person i see in the mirror. I used to have some confidence. now, I am just so closed off and uncomfortable in public situations and I no longer wanna be this way...So I am here. Going to truly try this time because I really want this.
(16 comments)
29 April 2017
Weigh-in:
310.0 lb
lost so far:
0 lb
still to go:
60.0 lb
Diet followed N/A
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