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18 March 2014

Weigh-in: 333.3 lb lost so far: 6.1 lb still to go: 163.3 lb Diet followed N/A
   add comment losing 4.3 lb a week

18 March 2014

Weigh-in: 333.3 lb lost so far: 6.1 lb still to go: 163.3 lb Diet followed N/A
   add comment losing 4.3 lb a week

05 January 2013

10 August 2012

26 January 2011

Ok... I'm really struggling at the moment...

It's week 1.5 of this journey, the first time that I think I've started with actual intention to finish... the other times it's been "let's see if I can do this" not "I am going to do this", and I'm going crazy.

I've always felt that my obesity wasn't as bad as other people's because I hadn't fallen prey to yo-yo dieting, crazy fad diets, or starvation. I didn't eat my emotions, just my boredom, and I had too much of a sedentry lifestyle. Unlike the people on TV that weight what I weigh, if you put a pizza in front of me, even a small one, I would just have a piece or two and be done with it. I can't eat more than one meal from a fast food restaurant, and the thought of more than half of my beverages in a day being something other than water is completely foreign to me.

Since I started actively trying to loose weight 1.5 weeks ago I've been good, I haven't had anything 'unhealthy'. No chips. No soda. No cake, cookies or ice cream, not even in 'moderation'. I honestly didn't want any of it, even before I officially started my new lifesyle I wasn't having any of that for a few weeks.

So you may ask, what's the problem? Easy - it all changed today.

All day all I've been able to think of is chips. Lay's BBQ. Tostito's with Lime. BBQ Fritos. Cheese Puffs. Sour cream and onion. Cheddar and Sour Cream. Simple ruffles with onion dip (liption onion soup with sour cream). And more. Thank goodness none of it is in the house - or it would be in my stomach.

If I had my car tonight I would have gone to buy them.

If I wan't afraid of walking alone at night I would have walked to get them.

I feel like a crazy addicted to food person for the first time in my life - and I really don't know what to do.

Part of me is telling me to keep going, stay away, I'll be thrilled later (And I know that this part is the correct part).

But I want to listen to the other part - the one that's making my mouth water.

I'm really hoping that this is a deadly combination of major PMS and an unsatisfying dinner, and that it will pass in just a few days. It will take all of my willpower to hold out that long.

**sigh**

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