madaboutmoose's Journal, 04 February 2010

Wow ... I feel like I'm being sucked into the Bermuda Triangle ... I've been so unbelievably busy lately!! It is almost noon and I am finally back at the office. The good news is that I have no additional appointments today. Of course that doesn't mean I will be interruption free but one can always DREAM!!! LOL!!!

I am feeling a tad overwhelmed lately. I think the stresses are starting to hit me a little harder. My hubby is really struggling with feeling the impact of his treatment. He is SO tired. And, other things too that just make his everyday life not like it usually is. He is doing an amazing job at staying positive for which I am very grateful about. But of course, I worry. I worry he is pushing himself too hard. The latest is that the doc now wonders about diabetes. He went for bloodwork this morning. My dear sweet grown son got a speeding ticket he didn't pay and the notice was sent to our home. So I was stressing about that ... since they mentioned things like suspending his driving license in the letter. The final straw last night was my husband thought the generator was making a funny noise and he announced to me that we would need to get it serviced BEFORE our trip to Mexico. My first thought was "how am I going to pay for that?" .... It seems like that darn generator is often the straw that breaks my camel's back!!

I think I was overtired last night because I had a difficult time falling asleep. The doc gave me some sleep meds but I didn't want to take one when I had to get up for work the next day until I know how it affects me. I did succumb to taking a Benadryl though ... then had weird "disaster-like" dreams all night. Hmmmm ... do you think it might be the stress??? I am very much looking forward to the weekend.

Still, amidst all this I know I have much to be grateful for ...

1. friends here and in my face-to-face life that will listen to me and cheer me on
2. my amazement that I AM in my range despite all these stresses and challenges ... who would have ever thunk it?
3. that my son ... once I shared my concern with him called the court this morning and arranged payment for his ticket and then was kind enough to let me know that he took care of it (one less thing to "worry" about)
4. my dog's antics ... which make me laugh out loud!!
5. life. I am grateful for life which includes the challenges, frustrations, ups and downs, ... I am so grateful for my life.

Okay ... time is up!!! I have a phone appointment I almost forgot about!!! Have a wonderful day. Thank you for listening to me, praying for me, sending cyber hugs, laughter, and well ... just being YOU!!!
180.8 lb Lost so far: 78.4 lb.    Still to go: 0 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

Diet Calendar Entries for 04 February 2010:
1383 kcal Fat: 24.54g | Prot: 81.54g | Carb: 225.03g.   Breakfast: 100 Calorie Multigrain English Muffin, large egg, fat free cheese slice, water, Fiber One. Lunch: Chicken Vegetable Soup, Blue Bunny Light Yogurt, apple. Dinner: Perrier, Lean Cuisine Schezwan Shrimp. Snacks/Other: orange, Eating Right Potato Crisps, Snickers Marathon Dark Chocolate Crunch. more...
3072 kcal Activities & Exercise: Sleeping - 8 hours, Resting - 4 hours and 10 minutes, Desk Work - 9 hours, Driving - 2 hours, Precor Elliptical - 50 minutes. more...
gaining 5.6 lb a week

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Comments 
Ok - we still luv ya!! 
04 Feb 10 by member: MomofTwoGirls
You don't have to drink those sleeping pills, let your body deal with the situation. My opinion: don't drink the kool-aid. 
04 Feb 10 by member: information
there is so much going on in your life. don't be surprised if it affects your sleep, and your mood. don't let it affect your health though...I agree with Info about the sleeping pills. of course you might think different and it might help you, but for me it's not the best way to "fix" the things. take good care of yourself, it's the only way you can take care of your hubby and your family.  
04 Feb 10 by member: jessyline
Eep. I can't take any kind of OTC sleep aid stuff without totally losing my mind. The one time I took Nyquil was by far the single worst night of my life. And I have done some crazy sh*t in my time. Lol. I wasn't even sleeping but I was having awful nightmares. I'm sure your stress isn't helping. I vote for trying the sleep meds over the weekend. Maybe it will be the thing to get you over the hump?? If not you can take a long nap. I know that, for me, the more overtired I get the harder it is to sleep. I start getting manic at night. That said I've never tried a prescription sleep med. Drugs always affect me in weird ways. I took a pain pill last night after my mole thing and I had an AWFUL night of sleeplessness, bad dreams, tossing & turning, anxiety. ICK. Hope it's better tonight. Good son you have there.  
04 Feb 10 by member: beets_yum
Agree w/ Jessyline. I hope you are embracing those five things YOU listed and they lift your spirits.  
04 Feb 10 by member: cindyshine
I agree that if you don't want to take the sleeping pills, you shouldn't. I take a benadryl from time to time to help me stay asleep better but it doesn't do anything weird to me the next day. I'll bet that if you can have a restful weekend and time to take a deep breath you will be back to your normal level headed self. Hugs. 
04 Feb 10 by member: erikag
Cautions about sleep medications completely understood. I am very cautious with ALL medications ... the sleep stuff is a last resort not a "solution" ... thanks for caring so much to share your thoughts. 
04 Feb 10 by member: madaboutmoose
Hang tough Buddy! You do have a lot going on! Sounds as if you are weathering the storm. I often look to you as an example of someone who remains resilient in the face of adverse circumstances. I don't know if that observation makes you feel better but I mean that thought as a compliment. I relate to the Benadryl dreams. I have had sort of R rated dreams. Sometimes I take Tylenol pm on a Friday night if I am wound up for the entire work week. A cocktail is nice too -- same effect! MUCH LOVE!  
04 Feb 10 by member: poet-in-motion
Ah ... yes ... how could I forget the cocktail??? Would have felt funny though ... getting up out of bed to mix myself a drink!! Tee hee!!! I did have a sliver of banana bread in bed the other night ... my dog wasn't sure what to make of his momma eating in bed. Thank you Poet for the compliment ... I do take it as that. The story that life writes is oft times different than the one I expected or planned for. I am getting more at ease with taking things as they come ... and learning to enjoy the moments ...  
04 Feb 10 by member: madaboutmoose
Oh! I must have misread. Silly me! I didn't realize that your inability to sleep was after you had gone nighty-night. I took you to mean that you are "wired" after work, dinner, chores, and such. No eating in bed for this dachshund lover! That's crummy! Get it? Crummy? Sorry. Couldn't help it! 
04 Feb 10 by member: poet-in-motion
Now my mom would say have a shot of whiskey. When I was young and crying from cramps she would always bring whiskey in my room and tell me it would make me feel better. I would never want it and she would say I'll do it with you. Must be the italian in here. My grandpa had a shot of whiskey in the morning with 2 raw eggs and another shot at dinner with his wine. He lived to 94. Hope you destress. Know I am thinking about you. 
04 Feb 10 by member: chattycathy1955
When I can't sleep I take ONE (not 2 like recommended on the bottle) Tylenol PM. Works like a charm; and I don't feel groggy in the AM. I hope you get the rest you need Moose... you are dealing with so much. 
04 Feb 10 by member: Chris1979
How did I miss your journal??? Or did you do the placeholder ala Info today?? I think that was it, OK, I'm not going crazy!!! Anyway, so so so sorry that your going through so many stresses - life is hard sometimes!! Maybe your getting all your "hard times" out at once, and will have smooth sailing once its all over! Get to bed early tonight, get a good nights sleep, and even try and sleep in a bit tomorrow morning. Have a good one buddy!! 
04 Feb 10 by member: MomofTwoGirls
Anyone for a little good news??? Bob's blood sugar was PERFECT!!! Wahoo!!! One less worry bead on my string!! 
04 Feb 10 by member: madaboutmoose
that's good news... I'm so glad to read this! enjoy your night Moose, sleep well tonight. 
04 Feb 10 by member: jessyline
Congrats on the blood sugar! Have a Bailey's sundae on me! It is tasty and will help you sleep too! 
04 Feb 10 by member: abbadabba
Good news on the blood sugar results. Throw that string of beads into the bin! The hardest lesson to learn is that no matter what you do you cannot change what is to be and worrying about it doesn't change a thing. The only thing you have control over is how you react to and deal with what life throws at you. I know how hard it is to let go of the stress. Listen to your body, prioritise what you absolutely have to do and let the rest go for a while. Remember that you've passed the half way mark now and are on the homeward straight. Lean on your friends and accept all the help you're offered. Sleep tight.  
05 Feb 10 by member: flaxseed
I think I jinxed myself! I have been up since before 3:00 am! Do you think your insomnia is contagious? I gave you a plug in my journal this EARLY morning! He-he-he-he-he-he!  
05 Feb 10 by member: poet-in-motion

     
 

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