ChicaLean's Journal, 19 May 2016

Well the body does what it wants in this case. I truly believe my goal weight is still 130lbs. so if I go back up no problem.

Things were tough emotionally yesterday and I had to leave work early because taking mini breaks to cry is not cool. I realize that I'm dwelling on the what could have been instead of the cold hard facts. I also realize that some of the angst and sadness is knowing that I need to take someone I care about to court. It's a tough spot but if I ignore this I'm condoning certain actions.

My focus is my health and feeling strong enough to face whatever is ahead. I feel better today. Maybe it's the concealer that covers my dark circles but I look better too.

It's a beautiful rainy day and not one tear has graced my face.

Best wishes everyone.

Chica on the mend.
125.0 lb Lost so far: 29.0 lb.    Still to go: 0 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.
on diet ChicaLean's own diet   losing 2.0 lb a week

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Comments 
So sorry for the rough patch, chica. And so proud of your attitude and focus. I find crying it out once in a while is beneficial...then I put my big girl panties on and get back to life. You got this sweetie. It looks like you've got a few more tough days ahead of you but i have no doubt you'll get through them too. We are here for you xoxo 
19 May 16 by member: ImLaura
Nice drop chica! Hang in there, I hope everything works out for you. (Hugs) 
19 May 16 by member: Mistybenner
I am sorry to hear of so many emotions you are going through. Interesting, that when I was teaching, it was very common to see young, lady teachers crying in their classrooms. I would often sit down, and talk to them. Kids can be frustrating and abusive. I have often thought about writing about my 36 years in teaching. I remember one instance in particular, where one of the top teachers I had ever met, was at her wits end. We talked for over an hour, and she told me, she couldn't teach there anymore. She left to go to another district. She was probably the best teacher I had ever met.  
19 May 16 by member: warrenwinter
Chica, hang in there your right no crying at work, lol just like no crying in baseball, lol Sometimes in life we must make tough choice and do not so fun things like taking people we care about to court, just know you are doing the right thing and hold your head high. 
19 May 16 by member: Rockiesfan
I am just back to fat secret and came upon your journal. I am so sorry for what you are going through and I hope today is a better day for you. 
19 May 16 by member: chattycathy1955
Yeah this emotional thing is quite new to me. I've been jokingly called a robot on more than one occasion. So I'm not understanding this phase that has lasted too long. This experience caused damage but I can't continue to allow it to poison my life. 
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
Thanks so much for the continued support. This is my outlet unfortunately. I don't want to burden others with this negative state but I'm trying to heal. @Warren, you must write your book. I bet you have so many interesting stories. And yes Rockie, no crying at work. No one caught on I just look really tired and of course it's allergy season. :)  
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
It is good for you to have a safe outlet. I have found in the past that Fat Secret is much more than logging our food and exercise and that weight loss is affected by all aspects of our lives. 
19 May 16 by member: chattycathy1955
You are so right, Chattycathy. Welcome back to FS and thank you. 
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
Chica, just remember you got this :) 
19 May 16 by member: Rockiesfan
Thanks Rockie!  
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
Chica I don't think you are negative. You are just expressing your feelings and if they happen to be sad right now then so be it. Friends listen to everything, not just the good things! 
19 May 16 by member: ny_shelly
Thank you ny_shelly. I'm so happy to have found this site and have such supportive circle.  
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
So sorry to hear about your experience and the emotional stress it's causing you Chica...always tough when things don't work out with close ones we trust...take care and take strength and comfort in doing the right thing!! 
19 May 16 by member: Steven Lloyd
Thank you Steven.  
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
I don't know what you may be referring to, but just FYI courts are brutal callous and uncaring. Often for both parties. So if you can find a way to resolve whatever issues you're having outside of that system you'll be better off. Unless you want to destroy the person, then use the court system.  
19 May 16 by member: KobeG
Thanks KobeG, I don't want to destroy anyone. I just want a resolution and to be fair to myself. I'm not in a position to correct the situation myself. But I can try to prevent it happening again. I'm taking my time with each decision in reference to this matter.  
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean
Clearly Chica, your troubles are turning into triumphs as you deal with the truth honestly. Reality is the best teacher. Letting go is hard, but often the most loving thing we can do. Thank God for makeup! I always remind myself, "Troubles are temporary!" & "Embrace joy!" 
19 May 16 by member: Lifesatrip
If we are talking divorce here, I have been there done that. Not to pry, but I understand your situation. Also, being close to an attorney, and knowing of lots of legal situations, I my be able to give some advice. 
19 May 16 by member: warrenwinter
Yes, Lifesatrip. I got a little sleep, some concealer and dry eyes. It's such an improvement from yesterday. I needed my little break yesterday.  
19 May 16 by member: ChicaLean

     
 

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