Katsolo's Journal, 11 September 2021

Up since 7, just had first cup of coffee and still need to make breakfast for myself and dogs. Plans for the day have already unraveled. Trying to figure out a lot of stuff including my feelings. I really hate those sometimes and will probably power through life first and process more slowly. (Writes and deletes a bunch of stuff).

Decent walk last night, I don't remember why I didn't swim, I think we just got back too late and I'm emotionally exhausted so I just crashed. Didn't sleep at all two nights ago and my body was catching up. Did eat a bit too much granola because the one I usually get was out and they brought the one that tastes like oatmeal cookies and the restraint was low because I had a glass of bubbles on an empty stomach. Logging it and down anyways. Full serving vs. 10g in yogurt. The world will keep turning and I know what I did and how to address it. Had a light dinner anyways.

I think the reason the losses are hitting me so hard is that all three of them were long term mentors to me and it was just a crazy triple hit in two days. Two ex-bosses I've known since I started. Solid friends with both of them at this point. We'll have lunch after they leave, but it won't be the same. My girlfriend that passed I've known since before 9/11, and that's what really bonded us at work. We had to slog through utter chaos and keep things moving even though the world was a mess. She left work a few years ago, but we had a scheduled call every couple weeks just to catch up with each other's lives. She was the wicked witch of the east and I was the wicked witch of the west but we had so much fun. The irony of the timing isn't lost on me. We spoke a couple weeks ago and were laughing on how we survived another f'ing life event. She didn't die of covid. I think she's probably proud of that because she would have been pissed if she had. I'm just thankful that my last few texts were expressing concern rather than full of expletives.

Blob down, muscle holding, weight down. Ate another one of those salty chicken things last night with lots of water. I think that's the key along with moving.

Only took one pic last night to send to another friend. Obviously, another very mature one. Computer time over once I hit enter.

Life sucks sometimes, but it levels off eventually. To all those we lost on 9/11, I reiterate that we will never forget. Never has this been more important. Now is not the time to let the idiots in Washington divide us. Onwards.

WEIGHT 162.3 lb
BMI 32.8
FAT MASS 64.6 lb
LEAN MASS 97.7 lb
WATER MASS 68.5 lb
BONE MASS 5.0 lb
MUSCLE MASS 92.7 lb

162.3 lb Lost so far: 18.7 lb.    Still to go: 27.3 lb.    Diet followed reasonably well.

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1365 kcal

Fat: 51.12g | Prot: 99.23g | Carb: 115.32g.   Breakfast: Whole Milk, Egg, Egg White. Lunch: Just Bare Chicken Breast Tenders, Briannas Poppyseed Dressing, Feta Cheese, Baby Spinach, Taylor Farms Asian Chopped Salad (No Dressing), Peach. Dinner: Barefoot Moscato, Kirkland Signature Kirkland Supreme Cauliflower Crust Pizza. Snacks/Other: Strawberries, R.W. Knudsen Family 2% Lowfat Cottage Cheese, MusclePharm Combat Powder - Chocolate Milk. more...

3614 kcal

Activities & Exercise: Apple Health - 24 hours. more...