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Pretty sure it was 125.4. Won’t matter though as it’s up and down daily. Don’t really care at this point. I’m constantly hungry. Like obsessing over food, tummy growling it so hard it hurts and I’m starting to feel ill kind of hungry lately. Ate 2-3 times my normal amount of soup the other night 😳. I’ve been going through protein bars left and right so I’ll be out of them way before they restock them in my store next fall. Do I care? No. Do I still want to lose weight? Yes. Will I get to 120 by Christmas? No. Do I care? No. Will I start satisfying my body? Yes. Maybe it’s the depression or just the season but I’m going to start eating more again. I’ll be eating out at least 2-3 days a week until mid January. IF hubby changes his mind we will have 5 days of Christmas meals. Some days having two meals and breakfast on the go (meaning not healthy and high calorie). While this is frustrating, I’m in a place that I know next spring I can lose anything I gain over the next month. Perhaps if the weather holds I can start going to the gym again and build some muscle then cut again in January. It just seems counter productive to gain muscle them lose 25% of it a month later. And how much can I really gain? I mean come on. I’m a post menopausal female who is a cancer survivor with osteopenia. I’m a smoker, fairly sedentary, not very healthy as far as eating and 90% of my activity is following my kids around and taking them to their activities.
Right now 120 just doesn’t seem possible. I know me and if I push right now then I’ll rebel and quit altogether. It’s best that I “maintain” for a bit. It’s what I’m doing anyway even though I’m trying to stick to 1200-1300. Being super hungry of a morning adds 190 kcal to my day lol. Eating gobstoppers so that I don’t grab a candy bar adds another 60-120. But I guess that’s better than a full on fried egg breakfast and grabbing that 250 kcal candy bar! Instead of adding 200-300 a day I would be adding 600-700 😳. Baby steps right now lol.
Off to a spelling bee today! Then errands and lunch somewhere quick. Then a choir concert if I can manage to figure out which of the three banks they meant and get there on time. Then home for kids and back to town for more errands then home for dinner. Already took the two youngest to school because hubby neglected to mention that he could only drop the oldest off and didn’t have time to drive the extra 10 minutes to drop the others off at their school like 3 miles away. He assumed I could read his mind and would be happy to take over for him. Anything for my kids so it’ll be a challenge to get ready and back to the school on time. Feel like crap today. So hungry, horrible headache, upset stomach... I feel like I haven’t eaten for a week then went on a drinking binge last night lol. Tylenol and food and shower here I come!
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