HerStrawberri's Journal, 05 July 2011

I hope everyone had a great Holiday! It was a beautiful weekend here. Hot but nice. We went to the big firework celebration Milwaukee puts on at the lake front and it was nice. LOTS OF FREAKIN PEOPLE...but nice. They put on a great show. This was the first time we went, and I'm glad we did. My stupid TOM was also this weekend so I was feeling very fat and icky, but I made myself go. Anxiety was a bit high, but it went away after we were in our spot and I was happy about that. there was a TON of bad food all around us. Funnel cakes, cotton candy, and a plethora of other fried yummie-ness.

( beware...this is going to sound horribe, but I don't mean it in a horrible way...just kind of factual) Everytime I smelled something yummy or saw the cotton candy guy, someone would walk by and i would be reminded of why i did NOT want any of that crap. Now, I do NOT make fun of others who are large. But let's be honest, unfortunately there are alot of them out there, especially here in WI, and I don't want to be the person some other girl is looking at saying....I better not eat the cotton candy or I'm gonna look like her. I have spent my whole life being made fun of for how tall I am and then for my weight so I'm very self-conscious. Add it to my list of things to work on. I feel bad for looking at those people and saying to myself, I don't want to be that big. I mean, I prob AM that big to lots of others looking at ME. It is what it is. But I don't 'put all my stuff' out there in all of it's glory either. I mean, if you feel so comfortable with your body that you want to wear a skimpy tank top and short shorts then good for you. I just don't think it's the most attractive way you could be dressing being a 'big girl'. I'm trying so hard not to be mean. LOL.

Anyway, For the most part my food was good this weekend. Had a few minor slurges...but I honestly don't care. =) I think I pulled through the weekend with flying colors, especially since my TOM decided to visit. I also walked ALOT and feel good about that as well. I also received a compliment on my weight loss. That is ALWAYS a good thing. =)

Oh, question for all you low carbers out there. I'm having issues with my hair and nails. My nails are really thin and bendy and my hair isn't as glossy as it used to be. I will admit I have kind of slacked on the vitamins and but started taking them again. have these things happened to you? I thought maybe my hair thing was my shampoo but I have changed that a few times and it still looks bad. It has been going on for about a month. Any thoughts or suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you!

Diet Calendar Entries for 05 July 2011:
1509 kcal Fat: 95.07g | Prot: 127.58g | Carb: 42.47g.   Breakfast: Pork Chops (Top Loin, Boneless), Light & Fit Carb and Sugar Control Yogurt - Strawberry. Lunch: Pure Beef Patties, American Cheese. Dinner: Pure Beef Patties, Light Ranch Dressing. Snacks/Other: day break apple crisp bar, 2% String Cheese Sticks, Original Deli Thin Turkey. more...
3602 kcal Activities & Exercise: Resting - 16 hours, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...


glad you had a nice weekend! i don't think you're being mean and that's probably because i have done the same thing. even though i was fat, in my mind i still weighed 140 lbs - so i would think horrible things as people passed by. i think me struggling with my weight loss is just karma - payback for all the nasty things i thought. i have since stopped doing that and have tried to be sympathetic to others who are large - i now know how easy it is to eat crap food and how hard it is to shed the pounds. get back on your vitamins and be sure to take daily. i've always had good hair & nails and have not noticed a difference in them since starting low carb almost a year ago. google it - see what you find. have an awesome day!! 
05 Jul 11 by member: sophie99
I wasn't saying bad things persay...It was just motivation to NOT eat. You are right. It's so much easier to grab bad food when in a hurry or convenience. I know someone who had gastric and lost over 200 lbs and now she makes fun or large people terribly. I would get so offended and tell her to stop and she was being mean. She watches what i eat and makes snide remarks to me all the time. It realy hurts my feelings. She STILL hasn't said anything to me about my weight loss. ( she is my partners momther) I would never want to hurt anyones feelings because I have lived this my whole life. now I feel really bad for saying that stuff in my journal. =(  
05 Jul 11 by member: HerStrawberri
NOOOOO! don't feel bad - you didn't say it, you thought it and that's what i did. never verbalized it - how could i? plus this is your journal and you are free to write what you feel & think. i was saying i understand. i'm sorry she says mean things - it can be very umcomfy - but rise above it and move on - you're doing GREAT!! 
05 Jul 11 by member: sophie99
So glad you had a good time!! I read in an fitness mag article that one funnel cake can contain up to 1000 calories!! :o I hear you on the clothing thing, just because it may fit you doesn't mean it is flattering or looks good. Hence why I don't own a two peice swimsuit. ;) Then again, I'm from the old school that thinks if your lingerie/underwear are showing out of your clothing, it's rude and trashy but I guess that's where society is headed now (don't get me started on wearing PJ pants in public either, lol!). I guess having a strong background in fashion design, I just respect classic taste in dressing. Take your fitamins and an omega 3 oil supplement (flax oil,fish oil, or krill oil). Have a great day!  
05 Jul 11 by member: nolechick
So... I have a friend that wears the skimpy clothes and shorts and such and she is a big girl and to me it is not attractive in the least, but I also think they are not attractive on my tiny friend either lol I think there are ways to stay cool and look wonderful with out showing your bits off to everyone around. I do agree with nolechick on the underwear showing being kind of trashy but that is just my opinion, however I do wear my PJ pants out in public - but in my defence they do not look like PJ pants more like yoga pants lol. AS for the bad fingernails/hair take your vitamins! I talked to my pharmasist (SP) about this last time I was in and he said it is a lack of a vitamin (I think it was Vitamin D but could of been Vit B) I cannot remember.  
05 Jul 11 by member: pixidaisy
I agree with that as well Pixi. NO ONE should be letting all their junk hang out. Little or big. I mean, showing a little cleave is one thing....ones butt-cheeks hanging out is another. =) I also agree with if it's in your size, it doesn't mean you should wear it. Big OR small! 
05 Jul 11 by member: HerStrawberri
Take your vitamins! Eat your veggies! I notice a difference in energy levels and performance if I miss my multi-vitamin...it would probably help with the hair too. I fall into the habit of comparing myself to other women, and I hate doing that, but a lot of the time I find myself falling into that trap. Yes I have seen the kind of women that you are talking about, I just think that well if that's what they want to wear, then great, I would just not wear it myself...  
05 Jul 11 by member: Jennifer2010
It's very common to have judgmental thoughts about others who haven't yet become "enlightened," for lack of a better word. A girlfriend & I had a convo about this very thing the other day because we're both ex-smokers. We were talking about how in our minds we judge people who still smoke, & how bad it looks to us now to see others smoking. I mentioned to her how I never really noticed overweight people before, but now that I've been losing weight for some time, it seems like everywhere I go I see morbidly obese people, & I have those same thoughts, "did I look like THAT?...how can he/she eat those loaded nachos, don't they care how much fat & sodium is in it?...he/she really needs to start working on that weight before it's too late..." & similar things. I can't help but think those things sometimes, but I do remind myself that I can't possibly know what those people are doing/have done to resolve their weight issues & it's unfair to assume they don't care. For all I know the dude I saw at Chili's inhaling nachos could have been dieting for 6 months straight & this is the 1 free day he's allowed himself in that time. So this is a long-winded way of saying it's TOTALLY NORMAL to have those thoughts, & you're not mean for thinking it. Now if you SAY things to those people...well, that might be mean, lol. 
05 Jul 11 by member: kstubblefield
Dont feel bad about thinking those thoughts. In my opinion I think thoughts like that are helpful since they help you realize why you are doing what you are doing! Its really helpful to turn down tempting foods when you have something you dont want to be staring you in the face. 
05 Jul 11 by member: allieaac
Thanks girls! I don't feel so 'mean' now. Great job on the quitting smoking Kat! Losing a bunch of weight AND quitting smoking.....you should be on a poster! =)  
05 Jul 11 by member: HerStrawberri


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