kingkeld's Journal, 29 July 2013

Good morning!

Wow. I really - REALLY - don't like registering this weigh-in. It's the heaviest I've been weighing in AGES, and it hurts to see.

This just makes it even more important to register the weight. See it as motivation, Keld.

Today, I am 86.4 kilos - almost TEN KILOS from my goal weight. Wow. That's a long way from home.

See, this is what vacation and parties does to me. I lose track, I lose control. Not good.

...

I did have a most excellent vacation, thought. I have enjoyed NOT being at work, enjoyed hanging with Wife, had fun at parties, wedding, and so much more. I have enjoyed the heat wave that has been tormenting everyone but me here in Denmark. Everyone has been nagging about hot damn hot it is. Me - I was just happy to have a week off from work and NOT be cold. I love the warm weather. Ever since I have lost all the weight I am constantly cold, and this is the first week where I feel okay in probably a year. I hope it'll stay and torment us a while. LOL.

...

So, about the weight. I am back in the saddle, and 100% motivated. I have 12 days to lose as much weight as I can, and I have a weekend challenge on top of that.

Friday next week I am meeting with the surgeons, and I really want to look my best. My best is NOT 86 kilos. About 9 monts ago when I was there I weighed 92 kilos - WAY too high.

I was told that they would like to do a little adjustment-surgery on my stomach, as they could do things a lot nicer than they already did. However, I needed to lose ten kilos.

Well, I went back after three months, weighing 81 kilos. I was approved for surgery.

So, weighing 86 is totally unacceptable.

Of course, it's not all that simple and black and white.

Since they saw me, I have started training at the gym. My body has changed SIGNIFICANTLY.

And of course, the 81 (and 92) kilo weigh-ins were both on Fridays. This sounds silly, but in my case it makes a heck of a difference, as I can easily fluctuate five kilos in a week.

I have had a wild weekend when it comes to food, and this shows. Not just fat gain, but water retention and food processing in me. It's all part of the equation.

I am 100% determinted to get this weight off of me, and I am already working on it.

I walked this morning - five kilometers. I went to the gym - 30 minutes of INTENSE workout, in probably the hottest room in town. Heat wave, remember? In Denmark, we usually don't need airconditioning, so the gym doesn't have one. I suffered today, but I did it. I probably dropped an extra kilo simply from sweating. :)

Since I am back to work, there will be fewer distractions of the calorie-rich kind. I will stick to plan. So far I'm doing good.

...

I skipped breakfast as always, and I am patiently waiting for lunch to have my first meal of the day. I don't miss breakfast, and I am in no way hungry. I think my body has PLENTY of reserves to eat from. I might even have lunch late, or skip it. I will have an early dinner, as I am teaching my weight loss class tonight. This means that I will eat dinner at around 4 PM the latest - at least an hour earlier than I normally would.

Sometimes, I gotta remember that losing weight isn't about how little I can eat. I know this perfectly well. It's all about creating the deficit, and just do this day in and day out, and live happily with it. Trying to eat as little as possible will just get me to cave in eventually and eat more. It's a bad deal.

So, I WILL try to have both meals today, and apples if I want snacks. I brought three apples to work, so I should have plenty to eat. I will, however, not eat unless I am hungry - regardless of what number of meals that'll make me have. I won't eat more than planned though. Gotta stay within the rules I set for myself.

...

You know... this whole weight thing is a strange game for me. I keep messing it up by going too far, and it annoys the heck out of me.

The rules are obvious, and simple. "Eat less, move more". Right?

I think I need to modify it.

"Eat less, move more. Don't eat stupid s**t."

I CLEARLY see that when I mess up, it's because I do overboard in "stupid choiced foods". These foods - like ice cream, candy, cake, chocolate - are what kills my RDI every single time.

It's not really massive amounts of "normal" food. I can handle that. It's the moment I make the bad choices that I end up in the ditch. It's obvious to me, and I try my best to not go there. Still, I feel that I end there every single time.

My normal meals are typically 400-500 calories. I could comfortably eat 4 or 5 of these meals every day and still lose weight. I could eat more than that and maintain weight. Easy. I could be overly stuffed at every single meal and stay thin if I only ate these things. I know this, and I see this.

So, why do I keep digging into the dumb stuff? Why do I choose chocolate bars over apples? I have actually grown to like apples. It's instant satisfaction every time I eat one.

I'm not always sure with the chocolate. Sometimes I really like it, other times I know it hurts me but it just doesn't stop me from eating it. I just keep going. I am sure some of you can relate. I can even be munching on it, feeling guilty, and considering an apple instead, still munching away on the chocolate. What the heck?!?

I think the mission this week will be to ONLY snack on fruit.

One 100g chocolate bar is roughly 550 calories.

This equals 10(!) apples, or 5-6 bananas. That's a LOT of fruit, and it won't get me in trouble. And if it does, I could just have more fruit.

I think this could 100% save my butt in the future, if I can just start thinking in fruit instead of other sugars. It would make everything so much easier.

So this is the plan for the week - and for next week:

- No food until 11AM.
- Only drink water, coffee, tea throughout the day. If anything else, sugar free drinks like Coke Zero or Crystal Light.
- Stay within RDI.
- No eating later than 7PM.
- No sugars. If I want snacks, they HAVE to be fruit. Nothing else is acceptable.

I really want the fruit to become more of a habit. It's getting there - a year ago I would eat NO fruit, and really haven't been big on fruit on my entire weigh loss journey. Now is a good time to get this hapit firmly implemented.

...

Like I mentioned, I do have one food challenge come Saturday. We're going to a wedding anniversary. Our neighbors are celebrating big time in their garden, whole roasted pig and everything.

For this, I simply need to set up rules for myself. I can NOT afford an Indulgence Day this coming Saturday, less than a week away from seeing the surgeons. This can NOT happen.

I will simply explain the situation to those who ask, and I will just have a small, reasonable plate of food there. Also, I know that the pork will be salty, so I need to watch extra for that. Let's see what happens. I just need to keep my eye on the prize. The surgeons meeting is more important than ANY dish or party.

...

Prioritizing is something that has worked really well for me in the past. I think it's something that I need to recall a little more too.

The trick is simply to ask yourself if you'd rather lose weight or have the "what-ever-food-tickles-your-fancy-at-the-moment". Usually, the answer will be a solid "lose weight".

It also helps considering what the extra calorie intake will do to your body and your weight. Especially around the candies and other high calorie things, this is a good thing to be aware of.

If we truly again/lose 1 lb of fat at 3500 calories, then ONE 100g chocolate bar will make you gain 70g of FAT (or lose 70g less). That is from ONE chocolate bar. Scary. Looking at it like this - even for me now - is quite an eye opener. Do I really want to sacrifice 70g of fat loss for a chocolate bar? I don't think so. So totally not worth the trade, even when there is room in the RDI.

...

Again, it's so simple to eat within my RDI when I make "normal" choices. I don't even need to be a goody two-shoes about it. I don't even need to eat healthy meals (well, reasoably smart meals helps, but still...), for my two main meals to fit within my RDI. It's EASY.

When I am in weight loss mode, I am allowed 2100 calories. That would be 1050 calories PER MEAL. How can one NOT do that?!?

Then, let's take out some calories for snacks. Say ten apples. That's total overkill. This leaves 1500 calories. That's 750 per meal. On most days, dinner is about 500-600 calories THE MOST, but much more often about 300-400 calories. And since lunch is usually leftovers from dinner the night before - but a smaller portion - then it's never above 750 either.

This is SO accomplishable, if I follow my new motto.

"Eat less. Move more. Don't eat stupid s**t."

...

Today, I'm thankful for:
- Opening my eyes.
- Eating less.
- Moving more.
- Not eating stupid s**t.
- Being back in my usual routine where I function much better.
- Eye on the prize.
- Wife. She's a-frickin'-mazing.

Life is good!
190.5 lb Lost so far: 151.2 lb.    Still to go: 3.1 lb.    Diet followed poorly.
gaining 21.1 lb a week

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Comments 
Hang in there!!! You will do it! 
29 Jul 13 by member: slacker36
Oh, I WILL, slacker36! :) Watch me do it! :D 
29 Jul 13 by member: kingkeld
Maybe you should listen to Paul McKenna again KK. 
29 Jul 13 by member: Sk1nnyfuture
so, i have to ask....have you tried any of those low carb/healthy foods. i am quite tempted to buy some of the chocolate bars and i did buy some of the miracle noodle for when start eating again. do any of these products work for you to satisfy the cravings? i noticed that some of these products are high in fiber which counters the carbs. just curious of your experience. 
29 Jul 13 by member: sailorgrl
Hi Keld, sure did miss your journals over the week-end. Glad you had fun but sorry you have had to pay the ultimate price. However, you have a plan and I am certain you will do what you have set out to do. Will follow your path this week. No 'fingers crossed' you don't need 'luck' with such a solid plan.  
29 Jul 13 by member: sarahsmum
@monicagrumme - here in Denmark, it's hard to find anything special and out of the ordinary. We're so behind on these things, except of course a few things here and there. We DO have a "chocolate bar" that used to do it for me. They come in three flavors, and they're about 100 calories for 2 dollars each. They used to do the trick for me. However, I bought one as late as last week, in an attempt to quench a chocolate craving, and suddenly it tasted HORRIBLE! It was like eating dry bran flakes. LOL. So, the apples seem like a much better solution. It's tasty and freshed, and completely unprocessed. So far I'm doing great. :) I'm eating apples, and they are helping me killing the sweet tooth that always build through the day for me.  
29 Jul 13 by member: kingkeld
Pam, it's funny you mention McKenna. I actually thought of it less than an hour ago. I might give it a whirl later today or tomorrow. Schedule is a little tight, and this does take an hour away from everything. Not sure "the rest of today" is the right time for it. It would fit much better at bedtime tonight, or early tomorrow morning. Thanks for reminding me.  
29 Jul 13 by member: kingkeld
You're a Pro! You've got this! :D 
29 Jul 13 by member: SELouisiana
You're still in the green, and you know how to get back down; you've got this :) 
29 Jul 13 by member: Firelair
The chocolate - have you ever read the mindful eating chapter of the Eat What you Love book? Until I read that, it WAS easy to go overboard on calorie dense foods like chocolate, cheese, etc because I would eat them like any other food or meal, like ... an apple. I cannot nor should not eat an apple size quantity of chocolate but when I was approaching it the same it was an easy thing to do, even after the chocolate REALLY lost it's appeal. This isn't separating foods as 'good or bad' either. It's like the chocolate commercial on TV - the one where the slender model takes ONE small square from the drawer and leans back against the desk and really ENJOYS it; unlike ME where the chocolate experience would include a desk littered with wrappers and sticky fingers while I worked through my sugar coma haze. Now.. I can eat a small square of chocolate or a single oreo cookie, give it time, and feel satisfied without plowing through the whole bag as I would have in the past. I haven't yet tested this with peanut M&M's though ... I'm still working my program, LOL> 
29 Jul 13 by member: FullaBella
@bella - what you're saying makes good sense. I rarely eat mindfully when it comes to candies and chocolates. Who knows, maybe it won't be as attractive? LOL! It's a good point. Slow down. Enjoy. Actually, I think I many times have chocolate on the go, or while doing other things. I will keep this in mind. Thanks, sincerely. I will take a look at the Eat What You Love book if I can. :) 
29 Jul 13 by member: kingkeld
The trick is simply to ask yourself if you'd rather lose weight or have the "what-ever-food-tickles-your-fancy-at-the-moment". Anyone know where I can get a bumper sticker with this on it??? 
29 Jul 13 by member: ClassicRocker
something that helps me with the chocolate craving moment is to have chocolate chips. Often, after lunch I want chocolate, so I bring 5gr of mini chocolate chips to the office. That way I eat it kinda slow and don't overeat chocolate. And I can control that moment. Get some mini chocolate chips, and if they're dark, the better! It'll help you with those moments. 
29 Jul 13 by member: Ponky82
I'd wish you good luck, but I already know you'll get it done, so congrats on kicking ass (your own) these next 12 days. 
29 Jul 13 by member: Cthulhu

     
 

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